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Closet Keeper

Closet keeper is alternative way to tell someone that there spouse is gay & has not " Flamed On" Out of the Closet yet..
Honestly, you man shook my hand like a baby , stands,walks,talks leaves only one thing .. .. you do know that your man is a Closet Keeper. .
by Mrbigshtt August 8, 2016
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Closet Sociopath

A person who likes hurting others, but denies it.
Wow, Ian is a real closet sociopath.
by juanmartinez November 27, 2018
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Closet Politician

Anyone who has political views and or opinions, but are too afraid to say what they think to remain neutral and avoid confrontation.
CNN Reporter: "What are your views on the Wall?"
Closet Politician: *Oh no, what should I say?* * If I tell CNN what I truly think, they will twist my words and I'll somehow end up on Top 10 worst criminals in the world.*
CNN Reporter: "Sir?"
Closet Politician: "Give me one second, I'm still thinking."
CNN Reporter: "It shouldn't be that difficult, it's not like I'm asking you to do a backflip?"
Closet Politician: "Did you just ask me to do a backflip?"
CNN Reporter: *Before reporter can get a word out*
Closet Politician: *Does backflip*

CNN Reporter: *Sighs and walks off, talking aloud to himself* " How are we going to make fake news if everyone is too afraid to tell us their political views, that is the fifteenth backflip someone has done today."
by Mr.TrollNDaNTaNet January 31, 2019
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Closet Simp

Refers to an individual (usually a male) who is in a relationship with another individual (usually a female). This person is a huge simp but will do whatever it takes to hide that side of themself from everyone. Acts tough with a hardshell but deep down simps for their significant other.
"Jeff is such a hardo, buddy a straight cold hearted savage. Doesn't get pushed around ever by his girl"

*When alone with his girl, Jeff is a huge pushover closet simp*
by YungJazzers July 8, 2020
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Cock Closet

Damn, she has one snug cock closet or dang that thing is as big as my walk-in closet.
by Yanks01 January 5, 2009
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Fancy Closet

It's usu. used as a joke insulting ones mother, usu. insinuating about their vagina in some way.
Guy: Your mom has a fancy closet, the fanciest EVER!
Girl: WTF IS THAT?!!1
Guy: If I told you you'd trolololol
Girl: ZOMG FUUUUUU
by Fiendmummy September 23, 2011
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Jim the closet demon

Jim the Closet Demon is the expired soul that was split into two and now lives in an inter dimensional state within all closets. Jim is non binary and uses he/they pronouns. Jim is insecure about his abnormally small hands and will be offended when you mention them near him. It is belived by some (the underground colonies) that Jim the closet demon is in love with the Turtle Queen. Many supporters of Jim the Closet Demon worship him. Jim appreciate sacrifices, especially children and will be kind to those who are kind to him.
Person one: why is there a small handprint in my closet?

Person two: it was Jim the Closet Demon, and don’t insult their small hands.
by Turtle in a box August 31, 2022
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