Humpty Dumptus

The act of performing a number two; a dump; relieving one's bowels

I will be back, I must go perform a humpty dumptus

by TW1ST3R November 28, 2012

Humpty Stumpty

Noun. Refers to an amputee with serious anger problems, to the point where their presence causes everybody around them to not have a good time and lose their buzz.

Man with no legs sits in wheelchair, angry: I fucking hate this place. Fuck all of you motherfuckers.
Nearby bystander, listening to the amputee bitch and bitch and can't take it anymore: Shut the fuck up, Humpty-Stumpty. Maybe you just got off on the wrong, uh, "foot." Maybe you have a, ya know, "leg up" on the competition. You look like you're a bit, uh, "stumped." Wow, I really put my, uh, foot in my mouth there. Sometimes you just have to take things one, um, ya know, "step" at a time. Stop being such a fucking buzzkill before I tip over your wheelchair and light your bitch ass on fire. Okay, Humpty Stumpty?

by Jack-the-stripper-ripper March 25, 2024

humpty dumptress

a girl with an egg shaped face, usually with a chin that drips into her neck

Lisa Lampanelli? That humpty dumptress with no chin? Yeah-- I always get her mixed up with Chaz Bono.

by bacardehali August 1, 2012

Humpty Dumpty

when a girls hot enough to hump, but her personality gets her dumped.

Humpty Dumpty sat on his balls, Humpty‘s big mouth went off the wall…all the ex-boyfriends and neighborhood men would never date humpty ever again.

by Shaggy6913 August 18, 2024

Humpty Dumpty

Fat person with skinny legs.

This doesn't include someone who works out and skips leg day.

Humpty Dumpty must've gotten off from the couch for the first time in weeks.

by My naptime July 7, 2022

Humpty Dumpty

a fantasy for kids or a insult
its also a cannon but we dont talk about that

kid: " guys humpty dumpty is such a cool egg
teen: bro lookin like humpty dumpty with yo egg face bro

by humptiest dumpty May 16, 2022

Humpty Dumpty

A relatively young term, emerging from the slang terms for Wednesday (hump day) and the act of discarding one's partner. Thus, Humpty Dumpty can be defined as a breakup on a Wednesday.

bitch: Hey girl, how's you and Mark?
hoe: Well... Humpty Dumpty.
bitch: Oh nooo then we have to get you laid this weekend

by CUMbova December 18, 2018