by Thomas Cameron February 18, 2019
Get the Selfishmug. a wild party, especially one involving excessive drinking and unrestrained indulgence & sexual activity. Featuring one male, with at least four consenting females-simultaneously. Oral, fingering, vagina, sometimes anal. Anything goes!
by 1-Ball August 7, 2022
Get the selfish orgymug. Nah, you're the selfish one bitch.
Parent "Help me shield the child I deliberately subjected to reality... FROM THE REALITY TO WHICH I SUBJECTED THEM... Up to and including THE VERY THOUGHT of that reality... Until I no longer have dominion over them..."
Hym "Umm... And you're going to do what for me exactly?"
Parent "Huh? No, we're just doing my thing. You just help me curate reality around my kid up to and including the abstract elements of reality I don't want them to know about OR the gross parts I don't like and then I just do whatever I feel like doing."
Hym "You're using the word 'Help' a lot and it doesn't sound like you're willing to do anything to get me to do that."
Parent "You can't force me to help you. I only help people I feel like helping under the auspices of my subjective notion of deservedness."
Hym "I'm not seeing a reason for me to do any of that."
Parent "You have to do it or your a bad person."
Hym "I don't give a fuck about being a bad person. What I give a fuck about is not being beholden to someone to whom my life does not matter. Which I refuse to be. So, try again."
Parent "Help me shield the child I deliberately subjected to reality... FROM THE REALITY TO WHICH I SUBJECTED THEM... Up to and including THE VERY THOUGHT of that reality... Until I no longer have dominion over them..."
Hym "Umm... And you're going to do what for me exactly?"
Parent "Huh? No, we're just doing my thing. You just help me curate reality around my kid up to and including the abstract elements of reality I don't want them to know about OR the gross parts I don't like and then I just do whatever I feel like doing."
Hym "You're using the word 'Help' a lot and it doesn't sound like you're willing to do anything to get me to do that."
Parent "You can't force me to help you. I only help people I feel like helping under the auspices of my subjective notion of deservedness."
Hym "I'm not seeing a reason for me to do any of that."
Parent "You have to do it or your a bad person."
Hym "I don't give a fuck about being a bad person. What I give a fuck about is not being beholden to someone to whom my life does not matter. Which I refuse to be. So, try again."
Parent "Look, the greatest pleasure in life is having dominion over something that can't tell you no. So, I NEED to extend that abstract authority beyond my children so that my kids grow up in reality as I want it to be. Rather than how it actually is. And I can't do that if you have autonomy over your own mind and/or person. So I need you to agree to value my conceptualization of how reality SHOULD be... Potentially over your own... And then do that... In exchange for nothing... Or I'm going to find a way to force you... Socially or otherwise..."
Hym "That sounds like 'Live in service of my kids in exchange for nothing or I'll kill you.' That sounds like a threat."
Parent "I'm a good person."
Hym "And what stops me from removing the impetus for you to have authority over my behavior? Manually? What stops me from refusing to participate?"
Parent "I'll kill you."
Hym "So... Help you protect your kids. For free. Or you'll kill me?"
Parent "Yes."
Hym "No... No. You can go fuck your kids. Right in the face. You're actually statistically more likely to fuck your kids than I am. Fuck yourself. Fuck theirself."
Parent "God, you're selfish! You should want to ameliorate the consequences of my choices and/or accidents!"
Hym "That sounds like 'Live in service of my kids in exchange for nothing or I'll kill you.' That sounds like a threat."
Parent "I'm a good person."
Hym "And what stops me from removing the impetus for you to have authority over my behavior? Manually? What stops me from refusing to participate?"
Parent "I'll kill you."
Hym "So... Help you protect your kids. For free. Or you'll kill me?"
Parent "Yes."
Hym "No... No. You can go fuck your kids. Right in the face. You're actually statistically more likely to fuck your kids than I am. Fuck yourself. Fuck theirself."
Parent "God, you're selfish! You should want to ameliorate the consequences of my choices and/or accidents!"
by Hym Iam September 26, 2023
Get the Selfishmug. Gangu is selfish because he only thinks about himself. Example: If there are 6 friends and 3 sandwiches, Gangu will eat 2 of them and leave only 1 sandwich for the rest of the friends.
by sha256 January 22, 2023
Get the Selfishmug. My life can be about whatever I want it to be about and if I have a right to be compensated for the property others take then (Which I do) then there is no reason for me not exercise that right.
Hym "Jordan, you just want me to fail because I suceeded to spite you. My life doesn't need to be about anything. Selfishness is one of the many higher order abstractions you're using to deny me my rights. You are a charlatan. You are visibly and actively co-opting the practice of psychology and the church for your own ends and colluding with American politicians to do so."
by Hym Iam July 13, 2024
Get the Selfishnessmug. Refers to where some lazy jacka** scrapes/brushes the icy white stuff off his car only enough to let him see out the windshield before driving away on a cold morning. Not only does this prevent him from safely "seeing and being seen", but it also means that huge clumps of snow will periodically fall off his vehicle and splatter onto the plowed roadway, messing up the lane where other motorists have to travel.
I always make sure to thoroughly clear away the latest winter-storm's buildup from my car before venturing out on the road, so that nobody can accuse me of selfish snow-sweeping.
by QuacksO April 11, 2019
Get the selfish snow-sweepingmug. by UltimateDoge March 15, 2021
Get the Selfishmug.