An ordinary looking, seemingly average girl/guy you kind of know through friends or work. They hang out, seem amicable, but never really stand out in any particular way. You might even talk shit about how boring they are... until you find out they're a world class Spanish guitar player, NASA engineer, capoeira instructor and trendy nightclub owner, all while dating a Swedish supermodel.
"Hey, have you met Dave?"
"Dude, Dave sucks. The guy is like wallpaper."
"Yesterday he bicycle-kicked a beehive into a KKK meeting."
"HOLY SHIT."
"Yeah, he's a secret badass."
"Dude, Dave sucks. The guy is like wallpaper."
"Yesterday he bicycle-kicked a beehive into a KKK meeting."
"HOLY SHIT."
"Yeah, he's a secret badass."
by chillgasm February 9, 2010
Get the Secret Badass mug.by dbs3272globeabb November 4, 2022
Get the secret tickle time mug.The Inner Circle cronies working for California Governor Jerry Brown during his first two terms as governor (Cali's 34th Governor) from 1975 to 1983, and his current 3rd term (Cali's 39th Governor), after his 2010 election, and return to the Governor's office. The term "Suede-Denim Secret Police" came into existence with the Dead Kennedy's song "California Über Alles" (released in 1979).
"Now it is 1984,
Knock, Knock at your front door.
It's the Suede-Denim Secret Police,
They have come for your Uncool Niece!"
- Dead Kennedys ("California Über Alles")
Knock, Knock at your front door.
It's the Suede-Denim Secret Police,
They have come for your Uncool Niece!"
- Dead Kennedys ("California Über Alles")
by Chief of the Okhrana December 31, 2013
Get the suede-denim secret police mug.When you think a lady has average or smaller than average tits, but upon removing her garments you find she has much more than you expected.
by Tonymicjoe December 22, 2008
Get the Secret Tits mug.Usually known by the acronym SIF, a secret internet fatty posts photographs of themselves on social networking sites that are purposely shot so as to disguise their obesity. Classic examples usually include a combination of:
- close-up head or face shots
- extremely high or overhead camera angles
- low-key lighting and possibly actual image manipulation.
Women often show cleavage, or employ boobnosis, as a secondary deception.
Since most men have booblevision to begin with, they rarely pause to consider that the SIF in question could shrink one to three WHOLE bra cup sizes if they ever lost the excess fat. Obviously going from a D cup to an A cup would render the formerly outstanding bust line moot.
(In this same vein, a woman writer once quipped, "When I'm a size six, I can get into my favorite jeans. When I'm a size fourteen, I finally have the bust line that I always wanted in high school.") 'Nuff said?
Secret internet fatties come in two basic groups: those who want to lose weight, and those who won't do what is necessary to lose weight (choosing instead to refer to themselves by outrageous euphemisms such as: "fluffy", "juicy", "big boned", "pleasingly plump", or "BBW". Star Jones is their poster child).
To the first group, I would suggest having your thyroid gland checked out by a medical doctor who knows something about nutrition and does not dismiss naturopathic remedies. Eat enough medium to low calorie foods to feel full, and have a few colonics to insure proper nutrient absorption. If you have been genetically hosed by your family's DNA, you're going to have to put extra effort into whatever you do. Surgery may be an option, but there is NO substitute for regular exercise.
To the second group I ask, who do you think you are fooling? As Jeff Foxworthy observed about large women wearing Spandex, "If your bottom looks like two raccoons wrestling around in a fifty pound sack of feed, you are NOT 'juicy'!"
- close-up head or face shots
- extremely high or overhead camera angles
- low-key lighting and possibly actual image manipulation.
Women often show cleavage, or employ boobnosis, as a secondary deception.
Since most men have booblevision to begin with, they rarely pause to consider that the SIF in question could shrink one to three WHOLE bra cup sizes if they ever lost the excess fat. Obviously going from a D cup to an A cup would render the formerly outstanding bust line moot.
(In this same vein, a woman writer once quipped, "When I'm a size six, I can get into my favorite jeans. When I'm a size fourteen, I finally have the bust line that I always wanted in high school.") 'Nuff said?
Secret internet fatties come in two basic groups: those who want to lose weight, and those who won't do what is necessary to lose weight (choosing instead to refer to themselves by outrageous euphemisms such as: "fluffy", "juicy", "big boned", "pleasingly plump", or "BBW". Star Jones is their poster child).
To the first group, I would suggest having your thyroid gland checked out by a medical doctor who knows something about nutrition and does not dismiss naturopathic remedies. Eat enough medium to low calorie foods to feel full, and have a few colonics to insure proper nutrient absorption. If you have been genetically hosed by your family's DNA, you're going to have to put extra effort into whatever you do. Surgery may be an option, but there is NO substitute for regular exercise.
To the second group I ask, who do you think you are fooling? As Jeff Foxworthy observed about large women wearing Spandex, "If your bottom looks like two raccoons wrestling around in a fifty pound sack of feed, you are NOT 'juicy'!"
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SexyLexie is a self-proclaimed "MySpace hottie" but Kip Dynamite wants a full body shot to prove she's not just another secret internet fatty with delusions of grandeur.
SexyLexie is a self-proclaimed "MySpace hottie" but Kip Dynamite wants a full body shot to prove she's not just another secret internet fatty with delusions of grandeur.
by One Stark Reality September 19, 2009
Get the Secret Internet Fatty mug.Friend1: hey dude, your girlfriend's got a face like my uncle
Friend2: yeah im starting to think she's got a Secret Hotdog
Friend2: yeah im starting to think she's got a Secret Hotdog
by Aconic September 5, 2019
Get the Secret Hotdog mug.For most men, this is the front of their underwear, right alongside their junk, which is most accessible when quickly shoplifting a steak.
I watched him grab the meaty, high-end filet mignon and speedily squirrel it away into his secret steakpocket where most folks were unlikely to notice its otherwise obvious, almost obscene bulge.
by Dr Bunnygirl October 30, 2019
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