presidential oath of office

"I (state your name) do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will faithfully execute the office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States, so help me God."

Chief justice: Mr./Mrs. President, are you ready to take the presidential oath of office?

President: I am

Chief Justice: Repeat after me, I (president’s name) do solemnly swear

President: I (name) do solemnly swear

Chief Justice: that I will faithfully execute the President of the United States

President: that I will faithfully execute the President of the United States

Chief Justice: and will to the best of my ability

President: and will to the best of my ability

Chief Justice: preserve, protect, and defend

President: preserve, protect, and defend

Chief Justice: The Constitution of the United States

President: The Constitution of the United States

Chief Justice: So help me God

President: So help me God

Chief Justice and President of the United States: (shake hands)

Chief Justice: says “Congratulations Mr./Mrs. President.” while shaking hands with the POTUS

President: Gives inaugural address

by 1234567890abcdefghij August 16, 2020

Scouts Oath

When there is no poop on the toilet paper when you wipe. Comes from the slogan in the Scouts Oath "Leave No Trace"

I just took a massive shit and there wasn't any poop on the toilet paper, I just took a Scouts Oath

Bro I just took the biggest Scouts Oath of all time

by SpinachTurtle December 2, 2020

Take oath

Take oath is a term used by travellers or gypsies to promise something like:

Oi you digymcoy take oath on ya mothers life you did not steal ma Charlene. You gorja

by Sugar shane on the mic December 28, 2021

fuck oath bah

the slang term used after a bloke comes back from a bender and is absolutely munted off nose beers. also used if a bloke came back from an all-male brothel and is about to get the dog.

old chappo: just got back from my bender and I am fucked.

Christopher: fuck oath bah, how was it?
old chappo: lahd I am pretty chuffed tbh, u should have seen the blokes on blokes.

by old chappo March 22, 2022

Testicle Oath

The highest from of promise a man can make. If a man breaks a testicle oath, another person is allowed to punch him as hard as they can in the testicles. Testicle oaths must be used with caution, but they are a sure-fire way to know if another man is telling the truth.

Patrick : "Hey man did you eat my underwear?"
Josh : "No way of course I didn't."
Patrick : "Testicle Oath?"
Josh : "Testicle Oath."

by Chac Culling March 23, 2023

Ultra Oath

In addition to being put under oath, the testifier is hooked up to a lie detector test, and a big Black guy is waiting to smack the shit out of them every time they lie.

Since perjury has become extremely common and totally unpunished, we need an ultra oath to ensure these pieces of dog shit tell the truth or face immediate punishment if they don't.

by Publius0987 March 14, 2026

Hypocrite Oath

A doctor who took the Hippocratic oath but ends up putting more people in danger through medical gaslighting, or spreading disease by not using proper personal protective equipment.

I went to my doctor because I had complications from an active COVID infection and my doctor didn’t even wear a mask, I wonder how many of their patients they’re going to infect with this disease. I guess they took the hypocrite oath.

by CrunchyBrownie5 September 22, 2025