A Midwestern city in Missouri with about 51,000 people. In Joplin, you are either a weed-smoking gay person who can’t wait to get out, or an ultra-conservative Christian who thinks that Planned Parenthood was run by Satan, worships Donald Trump, and attends one of the thousands of churches here. Most famous for Route 66 and the May 22, 2011 tornado. The north side of town is where you can find the not-so-rare Joplin Tweaker, who you can find dancing around higher than heaven and stealing Walmart bikes. The south side of town is where you find all of the houses built by Schuber-Mitchell, and where you find zero trees. Joplin features Joplin High School, which was destroyed in the tornado. It looks fancy, but it was shoddily built. It’s claimed to be EF5-proof, but 90% of the building is glass. The teachers and administration are fine, but the school board is full of wannabe conservatives who hate students and regularly fuck over the school. Joplin is represented in Congress by Billy Long, the Janna the Hutt-lookin’ motherfucker from nearby Springfield.
Little Johnny: Mommy, where are we?
Mom: We’re in Joplin, Missouri!
Little Johnny: Who’s that?
Mom: Why, that’s just a naked heroin addict talking about how the Democrats are going to cause the apocalypse!
Mom: We’re in Joplin, Missouri!
Little Johnny: Who’s that?
Mom: Why, that’s just a naked heroin addict talking about how the Democrats are going to cause the apocalypse!
by UnknownDuck025 April 23, 2022
Get the Joplin, Missourimug. A blue collar town on the southern edge of St. Louis county. You can find Arnold by driving 55 south until you see the big mint green water tower, the likes of which I have only seen in Boliver, Mo, however theirs is powder blue. If you do see Arnold, it is likely that you are on your way somewhere else. Beware of the photo inforced intersections and do check out the new Hobby Lobby.
There are many parallels between Arnold, Missouri and Granite City, Illinois such as: Everyone in sourrounding areas considers themselves superior to Arnold, often making it the butt of classist jokes. The high school has the exact same school colors and Mascott. People are reconed to have fancy pickup trucks and fly the stars and bars, but not quite as much as in unincorporated Jefferson county. And the favored shopping mecca of both cities, Wal to the Mart. Only Arnold is just in the process of building their Super Center and Granite has had theirs.
Having lived both places, Arnold is on the way to somewhere and many people pass through it and business and expantion are on an upswing. Granite, on the other hand is somewhere that most people try to avoid. There is no downtown area in Arnold and there is a trailer court across from the high school, whereas Granite has a beautiful 30+ year old strip mall.
Arnold is also much, much cleaner than Granite. Annual flooding of the banks of the Marimac tends to spruce things up a little each spring.
People from just about everywhere say, OH..and change the subject upon discovering that you are from either place, but for the most part the people who live in these towns are pretty are nice. Unless you sit and tell them about how awful the place is that they live and then they may understandably express frustration and offence.
There are many parallels between Arnold, Missouri and Granite City, Illinois such as: Everyone in sourrounding areas considers themselves superior to Arnold, often making it the butt of classist jokes. The high school has the exact same school colors and Mascott. People are reconed to have fancy pickup trucks and fly the stars and bars, but not quite as much as in unincorporated Jefferson county. And the favored shopping mecca of both cities, Wal to the Mart. Only Arnold is just in the process of building their Super Center and Granite has had theirs.
Having lived both places, Arnold is on the way to somewhere and many people pass through it and business and expantion are on an upswing. Granite, on the other hand is somewhere that most people try to avoid. There is no downtown area in Arnold and there is a trailer court across from the high school, whereas Granite has a beautiful 30+ year old strip mall.
Arnold is also much, much cleaner than Granite. Annual flooding of the banks of the Marimac tends to spruce things up a little each spring.
People from just about everywhere say, OH..and change the subject upon discovering that you are from either place, but for the most part the people who live in these towns are pretty are nice. Unless you sit and tell them about how awful the place is that they live and then they may understandably express frustration and offence.
Hey, I'm going to LA over spring break...haha...lower Arnold, Missouri.
or
I'm going to UCLA...upper corner lower Arnold...haha
or
I'm going to UCLA...upper corner lower Arnold...haha
by Don't hate on my hometowns January 20, 2009
Get the Arnold, Missourimug. After consuming a large amount of whiskey, Jethro took the local bar fly home. Without warning "Hello!!!" the Missouri Mudslide. Realizing what had just happened he quietly and cautiously made his way to the bathroom, cleaned himself, and walked out the door without saying a word.
by Cpt. Crunch November 8, 2013
Get the missouri mudslidemug. To blow your load and shoot it across the room and make it hit your partner, preferably in their eye.
by chumpchange June 17, 2005
Get the missouri rocketmug. lebanon is a city in missouri that has a very large amount of drug bust for meth. most of the people here like to jump people instead fight one on one. i live here i know what it is like in the city but out side it is nice with lots of rivers
by California123456789 February 24, 2010
Get the lebanon missourimug. Where friendships go to die.
by Curiouser Georgia September 3, 2013
Get the Springfield, Missourimug. According to the 2010 national census Springfield, Missouri is a town with a population of 159,498 which makes it a relatively larger town in south west Missouri which is an area of the state that is predominantly dotted by towns with populations less than 10,000.
Anyone who lives in Springfield can tell you that many of the residents lack two brain cells to rub together. Springfield has been considered one of the worst places to raise a family due to it's unusual high crime rate for a town of it's size.
Typical residents of Springfield are ill tempered, narrow minded and defiantly judgmental of those who don't fit their skewed perception of "normal" which is a bearded redneck the shoots a gun and thumps a bible and has a domineering over weight girl friend that bosses him around.
There has been a long time feud between the lower class, thuggish north side residents and the snobbish, upper class south side residents. Although the south side has less crime and has far better public schools with students that out achieve most of the north side students academically it still seems ridiculous to ethnically divide a town that takes less than 30 minutes to drive from one end of town to the other.
Anyone who lives in Springfield can tell you that many of the residents lack two brain cells to rub together. Springfield has been considered one of the worst places to raise a family due to it's unusual high crime rate for a town of it's size.
Typical residents of Springfield are ill tempered, narrow minded and defiantly judgmental of those who don't fit their skewed perception of "normal" which is a bearded redneck the shoots a gun and thumps a bible and has a domineering over weight girl friend that bosses him around.
There has been a long time feud between the lower class, thuggish north side residents and the snobbish, upper class south side residents. Although the south side has less crime and has far better public schools with students that out achieve most of the north side students academically it still seems ridiculous to ethnically divide a town that takes less than 30 minutes to drive from one end of town to the other.
Person 1: Have you met that guy who just moved in from another state?
Person 2: Yes, he seems pretty dumb.
Person 1: He told me he's from Springfield, Missouri.
Person 2: That would explain it.
Person 2: Yes, he seems pretty dumb.
Person 1: He told me he's from Springfield, Missouri.
Person 2: That would explain it.
by Chris the hated April 28, 2011
Get the Springfield, Missourimug.