Douche Canoe

A pussified person lacking any sort of balls to get a job done.

That douche canoe needs to fucking punch the gas and get the fuck out of my way.

by PRINCESS PHROGG June 17, 2021

Douche Canoe

When someone is such a douche that they overflow the capacity of a douchebag and is able to fill a canoe.

When you’re double dipping, you’re a douche canoe!

by Lilapowers June 17, 2018

two seater douche canoe

One who is filled so much with douche that it would fit inside a two seater canoe.

That kid is the biggest kind of jerk. One might call him a two seater douche canoe

by SwagBadger August 28, 2012

Douche canoe

A fuckhead that is the size of a small boat.

My ex boss was such a douche canoe. She constantly lied about staff behind their back.

by Peaches&Boo January 10, 2017

Douche Canoe

Someone so full of themselves, that they feel their physical appearance entitles them to to be admired. At which point, they then utilize this false sense of admiration to attempt to take advantage of infatuated victims.

That douche canoe thinks that just because he tries to impersonate Kurt Cobain, it automatically makes him a talented idol, when in reality he is an unskilled parasite.

by Seattle010518 January 7, 2018

Douche Canoe

Someone, such as a business leader or head of school who makes a drastic change at the last minute that impacts the entire staff and gives 0 fucks about it.

T:"there is a safety issue with the building. What should we do?"
J:"extend the school year at the last minute of course!"
T:"perfect! Morale is low anyway, so fuck'em"

Staff:"wow....what a bunch of douche canoes"

by AlSnow June 12, 2023

Douche Canoe

A person, usually male, who you wish would row, row, row the fuck away from you.

OMG he is being so obnoxious for no reason, like first he is all nice and I think we will be friends, but now he is just being a douche canoe.

by adidasDUDE August 30, 2025