Turd Insurance

(noun) - the act of a person taking a friend with them to see a new movie at a theater, and paying for both tickets, for the purpose of making a potentially bad movie (i.e. a turd) more enjoyable for them.

Boy 1: Hey, Jimmy! I really wanna go see the new Spiderman movie, but I need some Turd Insurance. You interested?
Boy 2: Sure, but you're buying, right?
Boy 1: Of course! I'll even throw in popcorn and a drink, if you promise to sit through the whole thing.

by Jambo_11 July 22, 2012

Turd Whistle

A Turd whistle is a Fart. Its a turd honking for the right of away.

"Brrrrrrraaaaaaapp! Did ya hear that turd whistle" "Hey there ya turd whistle" "Hey turd whistle, drop and give me 20"

by fartsupply August 6, 2018

Turd burglar

Its an ol done more that is kind of like the story of Jack frost except its A sneaky lil midget bandit theif in the night that climbs in your bathroom window and burgles the turd right out the bowl that more than likely are there because you got shit faced and forgot to flush or your dirty lazy kids left the bowl present for the turd bandit. Because the story goes.... Feed the turd burglar once a week and you will never get a stomach. Keep that gut flora happy ... Feed the turd burglars.

"Tiny tim dont flush that shit you know you got to leave that for the turd burglar tonight or you will end up with a belly ache

by Ghostbuster2000 February 8, 2021

Turd Tethered

When your brown snake is halfway out your back door, and the phone rings in the other room.

I would have answered the phone a minute ago, but I was turd tethered.

by ima_inspect_her_gadgets November 27, 2011

turd foam

The result of eating tide pods.

Caution: ingesting tide pods will result in excess turd foam during your dump cycle.

by Truth Ninja May 3, 2018

Turd Swatter

A person that we all know very well (there's always one that you know) that doesn't have a clue about anything anyone has to say but will take your last statement and either A, regurgitate it back to you like they've formed their own opinion or B, take your statement and repeat it word for word.
The word is formed using the word "turd" instead of shit to refer to your thoughts and opinions as said above your "shit" and swatter to give the image of swiping/stealing. A basic version of this word would be shit swiper or something along those lines.

The word is also becoming a popular general insult in the town of Cheltenham where the originator of the word currently resides.

you "I really like cheese it's awesome"
Hater of cheese "me too its just so good"
you"which kinds do you like?"
Hater of cheese "yellow cheese?"
you "f**king turd swatter*

by beauwtw January 8, 2013

service turd

Waiter or waitress with a very bad attitude and or service

Man, our waitress at the spaghetti factory was a total service turd!

by Happykitty66 July 26, 2016