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Facebook Jockey

A person who is all over someone's dick on facebook. Whether they're hating or just making worthless comments, they won't hop off.
Collin (photo comment) - Dude, you WOULD make this your profile pic. Put a shirt on man.

Sam - I was at the beach man stop being a facebook jockey. My dick's starting hurt just let go.

Jackson - word collin you've been facebook jocking niggas hard lately chill out
by thatreaddealnigga May 14, 2011
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Facebook Idealist.

These are the people on Facebook who like to bitch about poverty, war, domestic violence, child abuse, rape, bank robberies, starving children in Africa, liberals/conservatives, Democrats/Republicans, alcohol, drugs, pedophiles, computer hackers, the drug dealer next door, pornography, music, Devil-worshipers, endangered animals, racist jokes, holocaust jokes, religion jokes, political (in)correctness, religion (or lack thereof), animal rights, oppressive work conditions, sexual harassment, or how much their life sucks.

Like most idealists, Facebook Idealists hardly, if ever, lift a finger to combat the perceived evils in the world. They complain because they can't be bothered with finding, or lack the intellectual capacity to find real world solutions to humanities, or even their own, problems. In essence, they're whiny little idiots.
Guy 1: Look at this chick on Facebook saying "I wish solders didnt have to goes to warz, and that AIDS wasnt real!!!!! :(:(:(:("

Girl 1: Wow what a Facebook Idealist.

Guy 2: We all know one

Girl 2: And hate one.
by kbizz42 July 19, 2011
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Facebook ambush

Lying in wait on Facebook chat until the object of your ambush appears in green, and then immediately sending them a message, commenting on something on their wall or tagging them in a post.
Flaming hot #1: Goddd I can never be on FB chat anymore, that creepshow Mitchell keeps chirping at me
Smokeshow Friend #1: That's the worst. Classic facebook ambush.
by Brubes July 13, 2011
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Facebook trauma

Facebook trauma (or Status infliction) occurs when a 'friend' you sill have feelings for gushes about their new lover. A source of deep agony.
Facebook trauma examples...

- Can't wait to see my girl tonight ;-)
- Liam went from being "single" to "in a relationship" <3
- I have the best girlfriend ever!
- Here is a picture of us in one another's arms
- We're moving in together
- Cuddled up on the sofa watching telly
by Supraxi September 6, 2011
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Facebook Twin

Someone on Facebook that not only has the same name as you, they also look freakishly like you.

Usually the first result in Google when you search for your name.

Possible proof of a massive secret clone program that took place in the mid 80s.
Bloke 1: I added my Facebook twin as a friend last night, and now i'm sure some shady fuck in a suit is following me.

Bloke 2: Yeah, that's the Feds trying to cover up the massive clone program that took place in the 80s. You're fucked, dude!
by deathbymaumau September 9, 2011
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Facebook spring cleaning

the act of removing "friends" from your Facebook account every spring due to them not being your friend. Every school year leads to a build up of people on your Facebook account that you don't really know nor like, leading to an end year "purge" event known as Facebook spring cleaning.
Wow, I 'unfriended' almost 200 people during that Facebook spring cleaning.
by FBook Guru March 1, 2012
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facebook friend whore

n. any person who responds to friend requests, no matter if they know that person or not.
"Kevin is such a facebook friend whore....he doesn't have a clue about many of the people on his list."
"Debbie is very careful about who she accepts as friends on facebook....she's not THAT much of a facebook friend whore that she just accepts anyone!"
by BlackRock Woman September 20, 2012
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