Religious Masturbation

Religious Masturbation.

Speaking about the supposed superiority of your religion, for the sole pleasure of listening to yourself and showing off to other members of that religion.

A religious leader preaching to the saved

Etymology: the religious counterpart to masturbation; i.e. a process that is very pleasurable but doesn’t accomplish anything in the end.

The preacher gave a nice example of religious masturbation; a preaching about conversion to the saved

by Lyreluthier October 15, 2019

text masturbator

someone who likes/tapbacks their own text message; also: text masturbation

It's inevitable that Stewé will tapback his own texts; that text masturbator is the only one who thinks he's so funny.

by The original Studly Hungwell September 13, 2025

pet masturbation

When you proceed to jack your pet off and eventually use your mouth until they ejaculate

Mike attempted to perform pet masturbation but did it to hard and got bit

by trevelhasasmalldick March 20, 2017

blindfold masturbation

A situation in which people put on blindfolds and masturbate people they cannot see.

The teacher lead a blindfold masturbation session with his students.

by 66991234 December 3, 2017

Jamaican masturbation technique number 9

When someone inserts a pipette into the penis hole, and starts the release water in the penis. And starts jerking it. When they finish the water splashes out inside the cum and you start eating it for good luck. People may also use jumpercables to stimulate pleasure while doing Jamaican masturbation technique number 9

Yo Vincent stop doing Jamaican masturbation technique number 9 at my house

by Bleacher brah January 13, 2025

Death By Masturbation

Germany

Random Person 1 : Did You Hear That Phil Died Due To Masturbating!

Random Person 2 : Death By Masturbation? What A Way To Go Out.

by When You Cant Think Of A Name October 15, 2021

Masturbating Mike Tyson

When a man’s penis is so long he has to assume the classic Mike Tyson peek-a-boo boxing stance — elbows tucked, fists up by his face — to reach it during masturbation. Typically involves a downward squat and intense focus, resembling a fighter preparing for battle… but for very different reasons.

“Bro, I caught Kyle in the bathroom doing the Masturbating Mike Tyson. Dude looked like he was about to throw hands with his own junk.”

by A Dude Booty Meat June 2, 2025