Theologian

A male or female who is a fan of Divergent star, Theo James.

I am a proud Theologian because Theo is DAMNNN FINE.

by TheoJIsMyBae May 14, 2015

Ratzenberger Theory of Neuro-natural Selection

Also called 'The Buffalo Theory' is a hypothesis by Dr. John Deszo Ratzenberger who believed that by imbibing certain amounts of alcohol, an individual could increase their intelligence. Specific areas of study included problem solving, memory, and imagination.

Dr. John Deszo Ratzenberger, explains his theory to his colleague Dr. George Robert Wendt"
"...you see, (Dr. Wendt), it's (the Ratzenberger Theory of Neuro-natural Selection) like this: A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo, and when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That, Wendt, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

by boo boo the bear April 27, 2008

juddson's theory

Juddson's Theory goes as such - When going to a bar club any watering hole or any wheres for that matter, your chances of picking up are drastically increased when you do not have a condom or some kind of sexual protection on your person.

Romeo- " Hey man you packin heat tonight(condoms)?"
Juddson- " Naw b'y, Its bad luck ya bitz."

.. And Juddson's Theory was born.

by AitkenRomeo June 11, 2006

Hang Man Theory

The theory used to reference one of the great 5 theories of ookalan when you don't know the exact theory that needs to be used there but still want to win the argument and confuse the person you're arguing with.

If we use hang man theory, you can see that when you crossed the road you had no reason to look both ways.

by Ookalan December 6, 2018

The Big Gay Theory

There is a theory that the BIG GAY is actually a virus that was released by the Gay Bomb created by the Crystal Queers back in WWII. The virus would make its host hallucinate, making the host think that the same gender is actually the opposite. But it doesnt make the host hallucinate a woman or man, it makes them hallucinate a hard to tell crossdresser also known as a trap. And because of this, it makes the host a Big Gay hence the virus being called the G-Virus aka the Gay-Virus. It is also known that the G-Virus makes the hand you use to masterbate the most and makes it into a fap hand sandwitch and it also makes it sentient. It also grows a large eyeball, acting as the arm's eyes to watch you sleep and masterbate.
ex:

Person 1: Bro have you ever heard about The Big Gay Theory?
Person 2: Isn't that a sho-
*Gay Bomb Explodes out of nowhere*
*The G-Virus infects both of them*
Person 1: Man is that a hot japanese school girl?
Person 2: Is that a hot japanese cheerleader?
Person 1: Lets have sex right now.
*removes trousers*
*sees pee pee*
Person 1: Its actually a boy and thats gay but its face looks like a girl so it doesnt make me gay!
*after long Big Gay sex*
*realizes they dont actually look like grills*
Person 1: Oh no I have space aids.
Person 2: Oh no I am the Big Gay.

by Faggottini Holocaust February 1, 2019

Squeeze Theorem

The natural phenomenon observed when one eats a burger or similar bun-based food, squeezing the bun too hard, forcing the burger to slowly eject itself from between the buns. If this process continues, the user may be forced to consume purely burger and no bun, leaving the user with solely buns and toppings.

Some possible causes include:

-user inexperienced with bun-based foods
-too much lubrication (ketchup, mustard, etc)
-wet toppings including tomatoes
-nonuniform squeezing of the bun
-basic bun malfunction (cracking or tearing)
-etc

If experiencing Squeeze Theorem, the user should remain calm and not panic. Sudden movements may be fatal.

"Hey man, where do you want to go eat?"
"Lets grips some A&W"
"d00d, I hate that place, my burg always gets Squeeze Theorem"
"yeaaa... I remember, you had to get a refill on that burg"

by alaska st33v June 18, 2009

Rev Theory

An awesome band that almost no had heard of before they began touring with lynard skynard and breaking benjamin. Rich is the lead singer and is accompanied by 2 guitar players and a drummer. Listen to hell yeah and you'll see what I mean. They. kick. ass.

Hey are you going to see Rev Theory play with Breaking Benjamin?

Yeah man. Better bring a towel cause you're gonna skeet yourself.

by four20 October 14, 2009