A suburbanite with delusions of being a wild-west frontiersman.
* Puts on a pair of snakeskin boots and drives a brand new, sparkling ~$50k short-bed Ford to his middle management job at a major corporation.
* Calls himself a "country boy" but has never even done any form of manual labor and probably has girl hands.
* Listens to "country" (country pop bullshit about "beer, trucks and guns" which virtue signals conservative politics, not real country/bluegrass which is melancholic and mostly about being broke, sad, or shooting your cheating wife).
* Owns 20 guns but never actually goes shooting because he has to drive an hour to the nearest range - will never know the joy of shooting random shit from your front porch.
* Spent $30k on a wedding with a hot gold digging wife who will age horribly and harass supermarket cashiers in her free time.
* Emigrated from California to another state but trash talks Californians who emigrate to other states, thinks he's "one of the good ones" because he votes Republican. Believes other Californians are "spreading their politics everywhere" while destroying old town politics with his own strain of wing nut libertarianism.
* reagan/bush '84 hat
* Puts on a pair of snakeskin boots and drives a brand new, sparkling ~$50k short-bed Ford to his middle management job at a major corporation.
* Calls himself a "country boy" but has never even done any form of manual labor and probably has girl hands.
* Listens to "country" (country pop bullshit about "beer, trucks and guns" which virtue signals conservative politics, not real country/bluegrass which is melancholic and mostly about being broke, sad, or shooting your cheating wife).
* Owns 20 guns but never actually goes shooting because he has to drive an hour to the nearest range - will never know the joy of shooting random shit from your front porch.
* Spent $30k on a wedding with a hot gold digging wife who will age horribly and harass supermarket cashiers in her free time.
* Emigrated from California to another state but trash talks Californians who emigrate to other states, thinks he's "one of the good ones" because he votes Republican. Believes other Californians are "spreading their politics everywhere" while destroying old town politics with his own strain of wing nut libertarianism.
* reagan/bush '84 hat
Unionization rates have gone down and inequality has gone up for the past 60 years because of these retarded suburban cowboys. we should put them in a gulag until they learn how to do real work lmao
by Chuck Shiesty August 03, 2022
A mid 20’s to late 40’s ‘human’. Faux educated (not STEM degreed) whom has never traveled outside the US, or if so only to Traditional European destinations. Must remain faithful to a 150 year old tale from a Loner, who took his rich friends dads money, to write a series of books that conflict with each other. Typically super naive, living off welfare or fake disability, or a college (non STEM) professor. Indicators include not realising Trotsky made fun of them, dictators love their mindlessness.
Physical Indicators; a propensity for the older male to grow a silver pony tail, females defined by pink hair and both sexes given to morbid obesity. Usually listening to rage against the machine, and like the band, have been existing for over 20 years without ever attempting to offer up solutions, other than ‘unite’ or ‘we gotta...’ phraseology.
Physical Indicators; a propensity for the older male to grow a silver pony tail, females defined by pink hair and both sexes given to morbid obesity. Usually listening to rage against the machine, and like the band, have been existing for over 20 years without ever attempting to offer up solutions, other than ‘unite’ or ‘we gotta...’ phraseology.
Dave- ‘Hey Nate why do you buy printer ink every EBT payday?’
Nate- “I gotta start the revolution, the mans gotta come down, we gotta unite.”
Dave- ‘aww suburban marxist duties, well ok rents past due...’
Nate- “I gotta start the revolution, the mans gotta come down, we gotta unite.”
Dave- ‘aww suburban marxist duties, well ok rents past due...’
by ArmNumber7 September 25, 2020
Although Vivian was raised in the suburbs sheprefers to drink 211 Steel Reserve and listen to Sexyy Red instead of Miley Cyrus because she’s suburban ratchet.
by TahariTopaz October 14, 2023
"Dude, your mom is flying the suburban flag?"
"Yeah, she friggin' loves Christmas. And Easter. And Halloween. And Thanksgiving."
"Yeah, she friggin' loves Christmas. And Easter. And Halloween. And Thanksgiving."
by FreedomRock November 22, 2011
Kayaking in the lake that used to be your front yard or in the river that used to be the street in front of your house.
by FloodedYard March 31, 2010
Unlike going commando, which is to go without underwear, going suburban commando is to forgo pants altogether.
Ever since I got this telecommute development position, I've been able to go suburban commando without arrest!
by naijalak April 02, 2009
by Tarmmy December 23, 2008