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Dead man’s hand

When being blue balled by a girl, any man can utilize dead man’s hand. Wait for the girl to sleep and gently put her hand on your phallus whilst you fantasize about her jerking you off.
Chad: “So Brad, did you get lucky with Jessica last night?

Brad: “Nah dude, she blue balled me. I used the dead man’s hand though, so eventually she made me jizz.”

Chad: “Awesome”
by Anonymos Maximus July 12, 2021
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future dead man

An old man, born before 1960, who is therefore old enough to be GUARANTEED to be dead in the future.

Old lady born before 1960 = future dead lady

Old people born before 1960 = future dead people

Old man / lady / person born before 1960 who look to be in decrepit condition and use a medical device typically used by frail and decrepit people (HoverRound wheelchair if morbidly obese, walker, oxygen concentrator or tank with cannula, etc.) = NEAR-future dead man / lady / person

Younger person born in 1960 or later = future immortal (because we're more likely to live long enough to benefit from the discoveries of cures for all aging-related diseases including the aging process itself.)
I was born in 1985 so I'm a future immortal.

That future dead man who appeared to be born in 1948 wearing a Hawaiian shirt told me that turn from the southbound lanes to park by the northbound lanes was illegal. Seems Boomers who are future dead people born before 1960 are of the generation who cares enough to warn strangers of how the stuff they do is illegal while younger generations won't say much about it.
by EgaoNoGenki October 13, 2025
mugGet the future dead manmug.

Dead man's kiss

A kiss where the person dies during the kiss. This marks you to die next.
Friend:did he die!
Girl: ya at the end I think.
Friend you have the dead man's kiss
by Monkeykombat October 12, 2019
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Sell a coffin to a dead man

Very good at negotiating, smooth talker, above average persuasive skills. Coined by Candice on Big Brother 15
I don't really wanna by these girl scout cookies, but man, that girl could sell a coffin to a dead man!
by AugustG September 7, 2013
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Dead Man’s Smegma

Dead Man’s Smegma is a game of pure unfiltered wit and strength

To achieve this game’s true potential, 5 or more participants are ideal and every participant must agree to do absolutely anything the game throws at them

Each participant must put the most cruel dare or task they can think of into a hat, and each participant takes one from the hat

your reward for performing the dare is in turn watching 5+ others perform theirs, each as cruel as the next, each as cruel as your own

you must take responsibility for any consequences that come from Dead Man’s Smegma and must never blame the game itself
Nah bro, last time I played Dead Man’s Smegma I had to eat my own pubes “
by Kermit the Fag September 29, 2018
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Dead Man Tells No Tales

"Are you okay man?"
*looks over
".............."
"Dead man tells no tales."
by Frankster420 October 7, 2019
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Dead Man Bounce

When someone of significant importance fakes their own death and goes into protective custody so they can provide the evidence needed to take down “International Crime Rings.”
“JFKJr’s mission is an epic case of “ Dead Man Bounce.”
by Edge of Seventeen July 16, 2021
mugGet the Dead Man Bouncemug.

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