fantasy football

The act of inserting your clitterous into a man's penis whole while prying the penis whole open with chopsticks. This is all occurring during a fantasy football draft.

Man: Hey, can we fantasy football tonight?
Woman: Depends on when the draft is.

by Myqe the Rappist September 3, 2018

FOOTBALL

FOOTBALL IS THE MOST MANLIEST FUCKING SPORT EVER! EVERYTIME A PLAYER CATCHES A FOOTBALL, IT MAKES YOU SHIT YOUR PAAANTS! EVERY THURSDAY, SUNDAY AND EVEN MANLY MONDAY! THERE IS A NEW GAME IN THE ROUGH HOUSING BONANZA WE CALL FOOTBALL! AAAAAAAHHHHH, I FEEL THE ADRENALINE FROM JUST TALKING ABOUT FUCKING FOOTBALL! POP OPEN YOUR TOSTITOS AND BEERS MEN BECAUSE FOOTBALL IS THE SHIT!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

WOMEN CAN LIKE FOOTBALL TOO! UUUUUUUUUUUH YEEEEEEEEEEEAH!

FOOTBALLKING IS OUT!

MAN 1: HEY!
MAN 2: WHAT?!?
MAN 1: READY TO WATCH THE FOOTBALL GAME!
MAN 2: DAMN STRAIGHT!
MAN 1: WOOOOOOO-
MAN 2: WOOOOOOOOO
MAN 1: POP OPEN THOSE BUD LIGHTS!
MAN 2: OOOOOOOH SHIIIIIIIT!!!

by Mariachi_Lobster December 2, 2021

Fantasy Football Snake

Fantasy football snakes are the lowest of the low. They are the guys who take advantage of drunken transactions and trick first-year players into making questionable trades, all for the betterment of their team.

Snake traders usually begin the fantasy football season strong, but shortly enough karma catches them and their team begins to dismantle until they fall just shy of playoffs.

Victim: "Hey man! What do you think about this trade Yusef convinced me on? I'll give him Darren Waller for one of his defenses and the starting kicker for the Bengals! Pretty good trade right?!"

Bystander: " Are you kidding me? That is a horrible trade. Do NOT take that trade. Geez... Yusef is such a fantasy football snake. I bet he's lurking the waiver wire too for drunken mistakes. Unreal!!"

by Hectorino November 26, 2021

Football

Kick a ball into a goal

Also known as soccer

Let’s play football dude

by Mannamedjeff May 15, 2022

Fantasy Football Snake

Fantasy football snakes are the lowest of the low. They are the guys who lurk on drunken team manager decisions and trick first-year players into making questionable trades, all for the betterment of their team.

Fantasy football snakes usually begin the fantasy football season strong, but shortly enough karma catches them and their team begins to dismantle until they fall just shy of playoffs.

Victim: "Hey Derrell! What do you think about this trade Yusef convinced me on? I'll give him Waller for one of his defenses and the starting kicker for the Bengals! Pretty good trade right?!"

Bystander: " Are you kidding me? That is a horrible trade. Do not take it. Geez... Yusef is such a fantasy football snake. I bet he also scopes out the waiver wire for mistaken drops."

by Hectorino November 26, 2021

Kung-Football

Kicking/using your feet to keep a ball from bouncing up off the ground and hitting you. Especially useful for if you want to have kids some day. Poor testacles :(

I used Kung-Football to protect my nards. Funny thing Kung-Fu would be invited in Asia. We have a bigger more sensitive testacle problem out west. Oh well, at least I kept my nuts. and semen. and sperm.

by Chrisssythewhite February 26, 2011

Football

The best sport ever.

Let’s go and play some football!
Wanna play football?

by Quinn2772 April 20, 2022