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Tinder Advent Calendar

Swiping psychotically through Tinder after dinner each night of the holidays to kill time and ensure matches.

Alone in quarantine or bored stiff on their parents' couch, young singles everywhere swipe to the end of their daily allowance, reaping a heinous daily match with a past-prime hometown hottie, or the waiter from the cafe downstairs you've never seen with his mask off. Tinder Advent Calendar matches offer all the short-lived indulgence of the advent chocolates of childhood, but with the added risk of a dick pic.
Harriet's Tinder Advent Calendar currently features Abs Joe from Chem, now a year-round receptionist, and Cute Window Guy who makes ugly infographics on his Instagram.
by daltonjfk December 17, 2020
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Calendar

How about bring out a calendar.
Hey Urbie how about create a calendar.
Yeah I'd buy one!
by Don't you know who I am December 8, 2023
mugGet the Calendarmug.

Door-to-Door Calendar Salesman

Initially created to avoid having to say the term "groomer" (or relative terms such as "grooming") aloud when in the company of people, or in a place where you'd rather not have people hear you talking of such a topic. Especially when it comes to discussing the topic to someone who is easily triggered by the initial subject.
"Door-to-Door Calendar Salesman" is a code-term to use in place of a "child groomer."

"Selling calendars" means to commit the act of grooming.
"Going door to door" means they're searching for minors to groom.
"Asking a minor for calendars or photos of their calendars" means they're asking a minor for illegal sexual favours, or for sexually explicit photos of said minor.

Person A: "Have you heard that Onision has been going door to door and selling calendars?"
Person B: "What the fuck is up with that? Selling calendars...He should go to prison for it."
by horsehorsehorse December 25, 2021
mugGet the Door-to-Door Calendar Salesmanmug.

bobistic calendar

In the bobistic calendar, you don't have any past or future. Yesterday? What's that? Tomorrow? What's that? What I ate this morning? What's a morning? You just have the present. And the present is in the year 202030. When was Jesus born? Jesus is born at 202030. When are the next elections? In 202030. What was the previous year? It was 202030. Next Year? Thats also 202030. Yesterday, tomorrow, next week? None of them exists. Only 202030.
The bobistic calendar tells me that we are in 202030.
by fermentedcola December 26, 2024
mugGet the bobistic calendarmug.

Slide into calendar

Slide into calendar can be used in these ways:

"Hey Hege, I noticed an empty time slot on your Outlook… mind if I slide into your calendar?"

"First, he asked for a ‘brainstorm session.’ Then, a ‘strategy sync.’ Now, a ‘team lunch’? Hege, he’s definitely sliding into your calendar!"

"I saw him lingering by Hege’s desk all week—dude’s trying to slide into her calendar."
by Calendar Creep February 27, 2025
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crazy calendar

The official name of the calendar that mental asylum inmates, delusionists, and Qnuts follow instead of the regular calendar. The crazy calendar has the same number of days as the regular calendar, including those of leap year.

However that is the only similarity. The calendar has only 6 months instead of 12, because both the delusionals and Qnuts especially have to short of a memory span to remember the names of 12 months.

Each month has 60 days, with the exception of February which has 65 days. During a leap year, February has 66 days.
1: You know James?
2: You mean that delusional dude, who also supports Q?
1: Yah, he was saying some weird stuff like June 47th.
2: He probably is following the crazy calendar like all the over-insanes follow. Their June 47th is our December 18th.
by MST3K I like April 13, 2022
mugGet the crazy calendarmug.

Alaskan Advent Calendar

The act of jizzing in one hole of an advent calendar every day until there are no more left. Then you freeze it overnight and then eat the chocolates. When you have all of chocolates in your mouth, you have oral sex with your bitch and then shoot her with a massive load of cum, and when she is knocked out from the cum, you throwing her out the window onto a freeway.
I gave my bitch and Alaskan Advent Calendar and the funeral is next thursday.
by 6117 March 11, 2025
mugGet the Alaskan Advent Calendarmug.

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