ants on my log

When you spread your erect dick with peanut butter, line up a few raisins on it, then receive a blowjob.

I can't date Jenny; she has a peanut allergy, so we couldn't put ants on my log.

by Apple Bottom Genes August 24, 2011

ur dog log

After all the urs, this one is one of the most terrifying. “ur dog log” is to only be used if there’s no more hope.

John: UR GRANNY TRANNY
joe: I didn’t think it’d come to this..
John: wait-no-joe
Joe: ur dog log
John: soul leaves existence and everything is abolished

by Alossissea April 13, 2018

Tennesee log jammer

Involving two men and a ladder. Both men anally insert either end of the ladder while masturbating.

First one to cum gets to keep the ladder. The loser licks the ladder clean.

Ben and Ollie went to B&Q to try out the tennesee log jammer.

Ollie: "Unlucky Ben, looks like you've lost again!"
Ben: "Yummy!"

by neez123456789 November 13, 2017

Lincoln Log-flume

A very exciting technique to liven up any relationship, If things are looking down, suggest this to your partner. The lincoln log flume takes days to prepare, beginning with sorting out your diet to decide how stirdy the log is, which is key! Firstly the male starts the manouver by placing his buttocks above a females chest and squeezing out a nice big turd. When the excretion is complete the lady raises her posture so that the crap is sitting nicely above the chesticles. Then the male will stand above the head and begin to urinate on the womans chest, making the poop down the ladies body, replicating the image of a log flume. If the womans tits arent big enough, get a jacobs cracker and place it below the turd to stop it sliding down prematurely, The crap cracker can be eaten after if your a little bit sick.

The wife asked me to spice up our bedroom antics, i suggested a lincoln log-flume and then the bitch divorced me when she found out what it was!

by MilkmanFromMars May 4, 2009

lay down a log

to take a large shit

yeah mate I'll be right back, just gotta lay down a log

by bobjonas December 29, 2015

angry log flume

when having sex, the male is so desperate for a piss he can no longer hold it in and instead of pulling out he wee's in the womans vagina at such force the urine is forced up the womans uterus then to her stomach, this then causes the woman to be violently sick over the male burning his eyes and causing him to throw up all over her ending in a mass of sick.

this guy called ben needed a piss so bad during sex he angry log flumed holly

by sid and flo's mogging co. August 17, 2007

Bolivian Log Jam

Two people bent over, ass to ass, shitting at each other.

I thought those two girls had a double ended dildo,

But it was just a Bolivian log jam.

by EWWWWWWw September 3, 2012