wet the monkey

To perform a sexual act involving male genitalia that are moistened by any substance, especially by, ahem, natural lubrication.

I haven't wet the monkey in FOREVER. I'm seriously pining.

Dude, you wet the monkey when you're by yourself? That takes a lot of effort. I normally keep it dry.

by Garr Fizlock March 4, 2009

Monkey Funch

1. used for any undescribable secretion, act, behavior, or smell in a sexual or non sexual situation.

2. Gathered filth under the front seat of you pathetic beater car.

3. The fluid floating on top of Dannon fruit on the bottom yogurt.

1. The girl was so hot, i couldn't wait to go down on her, but when she took off her panties, her hoo hoo was covered with.... with.... MONKEY FUNCH!

2. No dude, i cant shoot hoops today, i gotta clean the munkey funch from under my drivers seat.

3. I gotta pour that Monkey Funch off of my yogurt, I aint eatin that!

by Kirk Anderson and Mark VanVlack December 3, 2005

spasticated monkey

meaning a person or individual acting very strange or studip. Someone being like a monkey of its brain.

Does he always act like this? "No he's just being a spasticated monkey".

by dylberto32 August 21, 2009

Rug Monkey

term for children, specifically one that's just been born.

Man my aunt just squirted out another rug monkey.

by thedeciver January 11, 2009

cock monkey

One who swings from cock to cock like a monkey swings from branch to branch.

Jason sprayed me again with an upside-down can of compressed air...what a cock monkey.;

by teh pwn jAs0n August 26, 2005

Beer Monkey

An imaginary primate that steals all your money on a night out.

I had to leg it from the taxi driver as the beer monkey had robbed me!

by JC Meister July 5, 2004

Monkey Island

Silly point-and-click fun at its finest.

"Look behind you! A three headed monkey! ... island."

by Spacecow March 16, 2003