by Northwestnas December 14, 2014

When your genitals develop a smelly smell after prolonged couch sitting. Usually from build up of sweat from sitting too long and/or persitant need of showering.
I spent the day off playing video games and my girlfriend wont have sex with me because I have couch crotch.
I really need to shower, I have some serious couch crotch.
I really need to shower, I have some serious couch crotch.
by Lilbritt October 22, 2018

1. (noun) A colloquial name for the Indo-Appalachian right-finned porpoise, usually found gesticulating betwixt couch cushions very racistly. Swims to the very far right and has a parasitic relationship with the “greatest” and whitest of sharks, when convenient.
2. (noun) A person who has intimate relations with an upholstered sitting apparatus, while they are watching p0rnpoise, because the concept of true human connection perplexes them.
2. (noun) A person who has intimate relations with an upholstered sitting apparatus, while they are watching p0rnpoise, because the concept of true human connection perplexes them.
Well… that Jim Dave Vance fellow turned out to be a real, self-described couch dolphin. Yikes. Is this why Cleveland had to get rid of Sea World?
by Judith Jetson Lightyear July 27, 2024

A couch in which the losers at -insert video game you're playing here- are forced to sit while they wait to rejoin the next round of said game.
by MoronicMaureen December 24, 2009

by Not your uncle April 9, 2019

The great American ceremony of retiring a couch.
Step 1 - take couch to wilderness, bring plenty of beer
Step 2 - start bonfire - get smashed - sit on couch with friends and reminisce.
Step 3 - when well smashed and bonfire needs more fuel, add couch to fire.
Step 1 - take couch to wilderness, bring plenty of beer
Step 2 - start bonfire - get smashed - sit on couch with friends and reminisce.
Step 3 - when well smashed and bonfire needs more fuel, add couch to fire.
Billy - Hey Sally, should we reupholster this thing?
Sally - No Billy ... It's time for a couch fire.
Sally - No Billy ... It's time for a couch fire.
by Mitchell Iz June 9, 2023

if you never leave your couch and just relax all day. Real professionals even tend to just watch Netflix while excercising this marvelous sport. GGG
by EstebañoTheGreat February 14, 2017
