Turtle Snap

Commonly, after a male finishes urinating, he pulls the front half of his briefs back over his groin and goes about his daily routine.

A Turtle Snap occurs when the male loses grip on his underwear halfway up, causing the elastic to snap directly onto the genitals. Side effects may include severe pain in the testicles, depreciation of self-esteem stemming from the brief inability to use basic motor skills, and strange looks from anyone occupying neighboring stalls.

Over-exposure to Turtle Snapping is likely to result in a Schlonky Donk

Bryan: Hey Mike, why are you doubled over?

Mike: I was so relaxed after my urigasm that I turtle snapped myself.

Bryan: Cool story, bro.

by Reasonwriter703 February 11, 2012

War turtle

A turtle with a army hat and a strap on minigun

Why have to take down the war turtle it's
Killing everyone

by Senorsuckmymeatballs March 29, 2017

turtle cave

The asshole.

"Hey did you get sexy with her last night?"
"Oh yeah, I tongue buttered her turtle cave so hard!"

by MindingFreedom September 2, 2017

Fat Turtle

A overweight turtle, nothing more.

Man, that is a Fat Turtle!

by FatTurtle1337 November 23, 2013

turtle gang

worst fortnite discord server ever. their staff is bad and if i could choose, i would demote all of them other than dannyy. he is a real mvp. @dannyyy i love you bro

turtle gang is a bad discord server, you should not join it. what you should is hit up dannyy though.

by ShapeFromTurtleGangMGMT August 9, 2020

Turtle Whore

Women who tease excesivly but are slower than old people fucking to give out.

Katie is such a Turtle Whore

by Rawr Cookie February 15, 2006

Jade Turtle

A Jade Turtle is special sex act performed on a man provided at an Asian massage parlor. The masseuse, dripping a small amount of oil onto the mans flaccid penis, gently squeezes the foreskin over the head, pinching it loosely with thumb and forefinger. The opposite hand then tickles the balls or nipples until the penis becomes erect, pushing and poking out of the foreskin like a curious turtles head.

'Man, I stopped at this Asian Massage parlor last week, and before I got my happy ending, the masseuse gave me a Jade Turtle!"

by Dr Knob September 24, 2010