Happy as a monkey fried in clarts

Someone who's really miserable or pissed of, clarts is a word for a wet mud.

He's as Happy as a monkey fried in clarts ain't he.

by Firesword101 April 7, 2025

Clart

Mainly substituted for the work fuck, however can be substituted for any word.

When substituted for fuck-
“What the clart?!”
“Your such a clarting pussy”
“Where is my clarting phone”
When substituted for any other word-
“You baited the clart”
“I am going to the clart”

by Sameer the clart October 31, 2019

Clarted

1. (adv) - To be strange or abnormal in a negative manner - similar to "clapped". May rarely hold a slightly positive connotation if used fondly.

2. (v) Mainly in the British Isles - The more common, past-tense form of "clart", the act of having been beaten up, typically via a tackle of some sort.

"I don't know how the fuck she can listen to this... shit's fucking clarted lmfao"

"Got absolutely clarted outside Tigh Neachtain's last night..."

by Tokuto July 9, 2021

Clart

To but someone in a semi aggressive way but can be used in a joking way. A word owned by Harry s

Nugget I shall clart you if you don't shut up

by Nuggets egirl gf December 11, 2021

Clart and depart

The act of having sexual intercourse with an individual (clarting) then leaving (departing) soon after.
Created by the iconic queen Ruby

No, I didn’t like that 🥷 it was just a clart and depart

by Rubyjulies June 19, 2025

Clarted

Clapped and retarded

Yo have you seen Natalie Portman. She’s so clarted

by Peter bread 69 September 15, 2022

Clarted

When you get shit on. Commonly used in context of a video game.

That guy challenged me to a 1v1 and he got fucking clarted

by nosleepforyou November 23, 2021