A 17 year old who smokes crack, wants to be a cop and has a Freddie Mercury Fetish. Allegedly Masturbating to Bohemian Rapsody 14.5 times in a day. Also he believes he is the next David Beckham but had to get air lifted to Rochester Mayo because his ankles got shattered when playing soccer.
by ballsdeepinyoursister October 9, 2019
Get the John Balfanz mug.Update on John he is now the number one drug kingpin. He sells to a diverse crowd of people all over the world. Even your 8 year old son. John has a distinct smell to him his girlfriend could not resist(weed,liquor,meth,starting fluid). But John has made a huge change in his life and now probably just finished in your mom.
by ballsdeepinyoursister May 2, 2020
Get the John Balfanz mug.John finally graduated high school and is now going off to knee on “innocent” black peoples necks while working for the Alexandria Police Department. But John cant lay off the drugs sadly died at the age of 33 by overdosing on prescription painkillers cause he blew his back out fucking all the cougars at a Moltey Crüe concert.
by ballsdeepinyoursister July 1, 2021
Get the John Balfanz mug.by T money inda house August 17, 2009
Get the bamfatron mug.1. A test you perform upon yourself to see if you really want to date the woman you're with or if you're just trying to have sex with her.
2. Putting on pornography and masturbating an hour before going on a date. Upon ejaculation, if you still feel like going on the date, you are really serious about having a relationship with the woman. If not, then you're just looking for sex and have saved yourself a ton of cash.
2. Putting on pornography and masturbating an hour before going on a date. Upon ejaculation, if you still feel like going on the date, you are really serious about having a relationship with the woman. If not, then you're just looking for sex and have saved yourself a ton of cash.
Jenny got stood up by Jonathan the other night. Apparently he did the Banach Test and fell asleep soon after.
by NyC PrO July 31, 2012
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