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Can Opener 

A slang term for a Speculum, the tool commonly used to open one's ass hole for object removal, or in rare cases, surgery.
Today students, we will be preforming a simple operation of foreign object removal from the anus. The object we will be removing today is a butt plug. To start we put the patient in the fetal position and insert the can opener. We simply crank the can opener in a clockwise rotation to widen the anus until it is wide enough that the butt plug can simply be removed with tongs. Should the butt plug not easily come out, use some pliers or something. Just whatever you do, DO NOT stick your hand or fingers in there. God knows what else has been in there.
Can Opener by Bodacious Brian December 16, 2013

can opener 

a sweet "jump" usually done off a diving board, in which one knee is pulled tightly into the chest and the other leg is extended downward. the extended leg enters the water first making the way for the rest of the body. when done correctly an amazing splash should follow. best when done off the high dive. sometimes done with hopes of splashing the lifeguards on chair.
1. that was a fucking mean can opener
2. lifeguard 1: yo, that retarded girl keeps doing can openers off the high dive and im pretty sure shes gonna hit her head.
lifeguard 2: yeah but her splash is amazing.
can opener by k'mutodragon January 18, 2006

can opener 

1. can opener - (v) a device, either electric-powered or operated by hand, used for opening cans, especially cans of food.

2. Can Opener - (v/adj) a derogatory term for an attractive person that makes you want to "pop your top".
Jimmy, stop banging your head on that can of peas. If you want to open it, use a can opener.

Pretty Girl in Heels and a Skirt: "Thanks! Have a nice night!!" -smiles and walks off-
Perverted 40 year old BoyScout Leader: "Your welcome." -smiles then turns to his fellow boyscouts- "WOW. That was a real Can Opener"
can opener by DimSumKitti April 25, 2010

Can Opener 

Whoa, dude! That was some can opener! How about opening the window?
Can Opener by J. Michael Reiter August 5, 2004

can opener 

A sharp edged weapon, usually used to cut open mexicans dominicans puerto ricans or african americans.
He was being a dick so I had to use my can opener on him.
can opener by Do I need a Name July 26, 2008

Can opener 

When a one-toothed bitch rips open your ball bag.
Hey Larry, I got drunk last, night fucked an old whore, and she gave me a can opener.
Can opener by Fidifo August 12, 2008