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montezuma's mustache

The diahhrea version of a dirty sanchez. Having someone with loose bowels create a thin line above the upper lip.
Theresa is certainly kinky, she enjoys getting a Montezuma's mustache every time her partner gets the trots.
montezuma's mustache by shirleys January 9, 2007

Stalin's Mustache

When neither you nor your sexual partner has shaved your pubis, and while thrusting the two pieces of hair intersect, looking like the mustache of Joseph Stalin.
"Oh comrade-san, we have crossed hairs and reproduced the great Stalin's Mustache!"

Jackson's Mustache 

The morning after sex, while the woman is still asleep, the act of cumming on her upper lip, then attaching a $20 bill to it.
A: Dude, how did that chick get home this morning?

B: Oh, it was no big deal, I gave her Jackson's Mustache.

Hamilton's Mustache 

The same as a Jackson's Mustache, just performed by the less affluent or more douchey with a $10 bill instead of a $20. While this is not the preferred method to wake up for young women the morning after, it is certainly much better than Jefferson's Anus.
X: Hey man, how did that chick get home?

Y: I don't know, but she was gone when I got back, I gave her Hamilton's Mustache.

dewit's mustache 

A mustache that has one side longer than the other. Thin and wispy. A person who needs some shaving lessons

Raymond's Mustache 

Raymond's Mustache is a God tier entity which has assimilated with Raymond's upper lip. This mustache is in fact sentient and has partial control over Raymond's actions, thoughts, and decisions. The mustache has existed long before Raymond has been alive, however, Raymond is the mustache's favorite host thus far. This mustache's biological trail can be traced back to the early 18th century, its first host was Black Beard.

The Biology

The mustache is impervious to fire, cold temperatures, acid, hair remover, and most other dangers present to a mustache. While there is no recorded evidence of the mustache being shaved or damaged by a razor, it is able to be trimmed by the host. While there is no danger to the host from assimilation, if he host decides to attempt to remove or shave the mustache the hair follicles with pierce the brain stem, killing the host. After the hosts death the mustache has approximately 48 hours to find a new host and begin the new assimilation.

The mustache connects to the host's brain by burrowing its fair follicles through the upper lip and through the skull to attach to the brain stem. The pheromones released by the hair endings control the release and reception of different chemicals in the brain, this usually ends up in the host becoming syndical and 'grumpy'. Raymond is no different, the composition of his brain is forever changed so that the mustache will stay in one place rich in nutrients and where the climate perfectly supports its growth.
Man, that thing is stronger than Raymond's Mustache
Raymond's Mustache by Lusamyne February 13, 2021