premature joculation 

The act of celebrating an event before it has been fully resolved. Sometimes quickly followed by an embarrassing retraction when things turn out differently.

The Pulp Fiction quote by the Winston Wolf character "Let's not start sucking each other's dicks just yet, Gentleman." is a great example of premature joculation.

premature joculation by JT Basher May 30, 2008

premature ejaculation 

Every man has a shotgun in their undercarriage. It has one barrel, but it can be filled with two types of ammo, urine or sperm. When a man shoots out sperm from his shotgun before sex or before 2 minutes into sex, he has prematurely ejaculated. It is one of the most embarrassing things a man can endure. Don't do it.

Premature ejaculation is a word too often connected with sex. Fight the battle against premature ejaculation today! Viva la revolution

premature ejaculation by Andrew Shea August 25, 2004

apex predator 

according to Chronicle, a creature that should not feel guilty when it kills something weaker than itself

humans kill flies with no guilt
snake kills rat with no guilt
andrew kills everyone with no guilt
humans, snakes, and andrew (because andrew is beyond humans), are all apex predators

apex predator by theAPEXPREDATOR May 21, 2012

premature ejaculation 

To jettison your bombs before the misson has been completed

BOMBS AWAY!
Damn it joe thats the fifth time today, you damn premature ejaculation master

premature ejaculation by Drue B December 26, 2006

Premature ejokulation 

The act of laughing at your own joke prior to delivering the punch line.

david letterman committed premature ejokulation last night.

dude thinks his jokes are so funny he prematurely ejokulates.

Premature ejokulation by spencedog April 11, 2009

Premature etextulation 

When you are texting someone and hit "send" accidentally before actually writing anything. Subsequently sending a blank text. Using this phase completely absolves your texting incompetence.

George: Hey Gina
Gina:
George: Uh, you sent a blank text.
Gina: Sorry George my phone has premature etextulation.

Premature etextulation by jaqueranda December 4, 2009

Premature Endjamulation 

The odd condition whereby Trey from Phish will cut off a seemingly perfect, and perhaps once in a lifetime legendary jam, and quickly & poorly segue into another tune. Though he often notices that this has happened, and tries to atone for it later in the set, the deed has already been done. The cum stain is already on the sheet so to say.

Yeah, I sure did. Just too bad that Trey ruined it with his Premature Endjamulation like the Piper and Carini that came before it.

Premature Endjamulation by tmwsiy November 14, 2011