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furious mastrabation 

An act of self-pleasure intended purely for the function of dealing with cronic stress. In many cases; this form of masturbation is grossly satirized with descriptions of men grinding their teeth, audibly growling, and exhibiting a pulsating forehead vein.
Larry : Dude writing my thesis fucking sucks. I'm going to fucking kill myself.

Barry : Dude ... take it easy man you know ... go home ... have a sandwich.

Larry : We are fucking beyond sandwiches here.

Barry : Have you tried furious mastrabation?

Larry : Furious masturbation?

Barry : Masturbating FURIOUSLY, just grabbing that little purple soldier and choking the fucking life out of him while you sit and think about how much your life fucking sucks.

Larry : You’re a genius Barry. I now understand why that bruise on your temple has never healed.
furious mastrabation by Darker January 21, 2010

Mastobation 

Masturbating while listening to music from the band Mastodon.
usually in correlation with the tempo of the song,guitar parts,or drums.
due to this fact,you often must change speeds and rhythm rapidly,making for a better experience.
Drew:DUDE! i just Mastobated to all of Leviathan!

Micky:No way! how big was your Iron Tusk?

Drew:Huge! it was awesome,its like i have a Hand of Stone!

-OR-

Mickey: I know just how to wake up my Sleeping Giant,ill just pop in Blood Mountain and...The Wolf is Loose!

Grandparents: Mastobation sure keeps our Hearts Alive!

so on and so forth...
Mastobation by Dandy Ritcher February 24, 2011

mathtrobation 

Stroking your ego with self serving rationalizations in the face of undeniable mathematical proof to the contrary.
Karl Rove's prolonged display of mathtrobation was a pathetic attempt to argue Mitt Romney could/would win Florida when it was determined numerically he could not.
mathtrobation by czoggit11 November 19, 2012

Maestrobating

Self indulgent musical wanking.

Pleasing ones self through music.
He continued Maestrobating though no one liked the music he played at all.
Maestrobating by xtian December 2, 2005

masprobation 

the time period where one decides to stop masterbating to prove a point or to give their junk a rest
Dude, ive wacked off so many times that my dick is starting to peel. I think im gonna start a masprobation period.
masprobation by El Cabo February 5, 2010