3 definitions by uncle johan

yogi pull

The act of two-handed masturbation with anal beads inserted into your rectum and hooking the string of beads to a big toe for extraction at the precise moment. Upon ejaculating the beads are pulled out with the toe. The position one must assume to accomplish the yogi pull is similar to the "tree pose" in yoga.

Imagine Junior's surprise when his wife caught him doing the yogi pull in front of the bathroom mirror. Not only did this cause permanent psychological harm to the wife, but this was Junior's first attempt at the yogi pull and upon being caught, he lost his balance and knocked himself out on his shitter.

by uncle johan May 11, 2009

billyrayness

The metric used to describe the level of redneck attributes of a person, place or thing.

The billyrayness at Walmart keeps me from shopping there.

by uncle johan May 11, 2009

dry rub

Masturbating without any kind of lubrication due to time or location constraints.

I only had a few minutes to jerk off before I would get interrupted, so I was forced to dry rub.

by uncle johan May 11, 2009