3 definitions by superdudeman

1. A morbidly obese Russian, comprised mostly of blubber, who tries to wrestle bears, but eats them instead. A humorless, emotionless automaton, who resembles Karnov. A Kio is found wearing the bloody, odiferous, pieces of what its devoured, claiming it’s a trophy and it’s a matter of Russian pride. A disgusting, fowl beast that doesn’t understand eating the dinner table is impolite.

2. A disease that effects Russians, that causes unusual hair growth, ugliness, and the urge to use kettle bells. Some side effects usually include weight gain, loss of soul, penile inversion, and the irritating favoritism of Monty python.
3. A group of individuals who only speak nerd, and who look Russian but are despised by both. A total Pinko who secretly wears shirts with pictures of Stalin and spends his free time reading the communist manifesto.
4. You know what…" Fuck you."
Oleg: "So..have you had a chance to meet my newborn son kio?"
Jon: "Yes, I love the hammer and sickle you had tattooed all over his entire face."
Will: "I'm the worst person in the world."
Oleg: " At least you're not a Kio."
Bob:" Why is it that Sam over there is pounding his chest and stapling a wig to his forehead?"
Jim: "He's a kio."
Sam: "How am I going to win a farting contest with someone who smells like shit?"
Oleg: "You cannot play such childish games with a KIo.. we are unaffected by odor, and decency!"
by superdudeman June 27, 2009
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1. An abject ninja, who constantly falls off of rooftops, throws shrunken only to impale oneself, and manages to only roundhouse itself in the face.
2. A technique of kung fu where you stab yourself in every major organ, in order to gain the element of surprise.
3. A ninja method of subterfuge, where the ninja hides in broad daylight, wearing bells. Adopted from Ueshiba Morihei's theory of "hidden in plain sight."
4. A gay ninja, who resembles "Bonk" from bonks adventures. An utter disappointment to his sensei, and who was banished from Japan, for using his kung fu stealth "inappropriately". Usually found wearing his ass less ninja uniform trying to bounce off of clouds. He is noted for his unusual battle cry; "sssseppuku!" and his stance against the Tabi long boots, and his favoritism toward pink Ugs.
5. A ninja who invented the dildo tipped grappling hook, the silicon padded ninja claw, and plastic vibrating Bokken.
Steve: "Why is mike jump kicking the printer?"
Bill: "Hes a tsujimoto."

Dan: "I just felt a strong hand cup my crotch. But i dont see anyone else around."

Jessica: "dont look at me.. it must have been that tsujimoto over there.. hes one sneaky bastard."
by superdudeman June 26, 2009
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1. A demonstration of homosexuality. A means of expressing how gay a man is. A homoerotic unit of measurement.
2. A Russian way to exercise that says "I can exercise with the big boys!" It’s the power lifters equivalent to a girl pushup.
3. A secret society of the gay community.
An exercise used to initiate you into Gaydom.
Sally: "Oleg really likes his kettlebell."
Jane: "Hes obviously gay."

Bruce: "Are there any hot guys here tonight?"
Prudence: "oooh yes! Those guys over there are my little kettlebell men!"
by superdudeman June 24, 2009
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