spjork's definitions

keelhaul

The unsavory practice of surprising a sleeping partner by running the full length of a sweaty grundle across their nose/face.

After a five hour bike ride, Neil couldn't wait to get home, get out of his spandex, and keelhaul his girlfriend.

by Spjork June 8, 2005

Badger

The male equivalent of a cougar, i. e. an older man, past his prime cruising around to bars looking for young girls to sleep with. Inspired by the badgers reputation as being, short, squat, somewhat ugly, but with a tenacious grip. Also it's part of the weasel family.

Oh my god that Badger wouldn't leave you alone! He should iron his shirt and start dating someone over 40.

by spjork September 7, 2007