Definitions by shmek

crunch bump 

The two ticks up in volume you do on a tv, computer, or other audio source when you're eating a crunchy food so you can still hear it.

"I was watching The Big Bang Theory and opened a bag of pretzels, so I had to crunch bump the volume."
"I know exactly what you mean! But dude, I didn't know you watched The Big Bang Theory. We can't be friends anymore, sorry."

crunch bump by shmek October 26, 2017

trumpkin 

An act wherein one tweets lies, bullshit, or statements that incite violence whilst on the toilet (preferably a golden one).

Also known as "shit spewing out both ends"

The president-elect had a trumpkin earlier when he made fun of SNL--yet again--from his golden throne at 3:30am.

trumpkin by shmek December 8, 2016

Face Boo 

A lover or boyfriend/girlfriend that has reached the status of being "In a Relationship" with you on Facebook.

Ron: WHAT?? My brother is in a relationship? W.T.Fucks?
Eric: What, you didn't know?
Ron: No, I knew he was sort of dating someone but I didn't know they were face boo's.
Eric: Haha, that's rich.
Ron: Us gays make the best nicknames!!!

Face Boo by shmek April 25, 2011

Sportscenter Blackout 

When you avoid Sportscenter for a few days following a game, trade or other sporting event that upsets you or went directly against a team you root for.

Me: Melo's goin' to the Knicks!!!
Pete: Dude, I'm a Nuggets fan. I hate you and I'm going on Sportscenter Blackout for a few days now.

Sportscenter Blackout by shmek March 8, 2011

DVR-tard 

A person who forgets they are watching a DVR'ed TV program until the 2nd or 3rd commercial.

Vin: "Hey Eric, wanna go over to A.J.'s place and watch HIMYM?"
Eric: "Nah, man, he's a DVR-Tard...he never remembers to fast-forward the commercials."

DVR-tard by shmek December 1, 2010