Pessimist

A person who, if they refrain from suicide, will one day be happy.

A: It's freezing. My heater's broken, and it's ten below zero. I cut my arm on a rusty fence, and my idiot neighbour pissed on my house today. I hate this goddamn planet!

B: Hey, you like apple pie?

A: Shut the...well yeah I actually I do.

B: Great, let's go. No, put your wallet down; I've got it covered.

by Ralph January 13, 2005

Squirrel

This is a term for a light person who can drink as much if not more than you.

Eric Ward is a squirril. He drank his body weight in beer tonite.

by Ralph February 12, 2005

Mothers Milk

The best damn beer in the world.

Dude pour me another pint of Mothers Milk, damn this is good beer!

by Ralph May 01, 2004

Awkward moment

Moments that occur whenever I open my mouth for more than two minutes.

A: So, what time is it?
Everyone else: -Stares in abject shock.-
A: Umm...I just asked what time it was.
Everyone else: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU SUCK.
A: ...That was...awkward.

by Ralph March 22, 2005