67 definitions by mr ben

The world's first, greatest and only 24-hour-a-day rolling news channel. Only it has commercials. And shit journalists with corporate agendas. Basically, the Western World's equivilent to Communist Chinese TV.
"And now on Sky News, there's trouble at our rival station BBC News 24. Hahaha! Serves them right. Ahem! Where was I?"
by mr ben February 7, 2005
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An obnoxious teenager who pretends to be blind-drunk after unwittingly drinking a plain Red Bull, expecting vodka or Jack Daniels to be mixed inside.
"Leah is such a featherweight, it's embarrassing!"
by mr ben February 8, 2005
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Same thing as a rake - a thin person who eats like a horse without putting on any weight whatsoever. In short, a lucky bastard.

Could also mean a type of shaggy haircut that's popular with students and road protesters.
1. "Eat this burger, you fucking mop!"

2. "I would climb down this tree but my mop is caught in the branches."
by mr ben February 8, 2005
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In soccer: to punt the ball as hard as you can towards an open and easy goal, only to find your strike sailing over the crossbar by a country mile and ending up forty-one rows behind the goal. The higher the ball goes, the louder one should exclaim.
"HADJI!" - Mr Ben, upon witnessing David Beckham's penalty against Portugal during Euro 2004.
by mr ben February 7, 2005
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A sadly incurable condition, usually occuring in young men. The sufferer of machoegotism strikes up an extraordinary relationship with himself (possibly due to excess masturbation) that results in the sufferer falling in love with themselves. They are incapable of replicating genuine feelings for others, though they attempt to hide their emotional vacuum by imitating feelings or responses.

Treatments are being developed as you read this but scientists believe a cure is some way off. For now, temporary relief may be gaining by a sniff knee to the happy sacks or by telling them, in a way that is impossible to not understand, to fuck off.
"That guy defintely suffers from machoegotism. He displays all the symptons."
by mr ben February 7, 2005
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Black holes are rarely seen creatures that operate in the shadows. If anything is left lying around or falls off a table, a black hole might (for they are decreasing in number) run past and swallow it up. The reasons for them doing so are unknown but what is odd is that some of them redeposit what they've swallowed at a different location. Not to be confused with thieving gypsy bastards.
"Has anyone seen my pen?" - typical response after a black hole feeding session.
by mr ben February 9, 2005
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Fairly self-explanatory, I thought. Unseen or unknown person who steals petty things like pens and penny coins. Not to be confused with black holes.
by mr ben February 9, 2005
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