Definitions by kryptic888
movie club
A monthly gathering of ageing blokes, who’ve somehow convinced themselves that sitting in a dark room drinking piss and talking over a movie counts as a personality.
The film itself is largely ceremonial. One bloke picks something unbearably long to prove he has taste, another falls asleep 25 minutes in, someone spends the entire night on his phone, and the loudest idiot explains the plot to everyone despite clearly not understanding it.
Conversation usually consists of recycled stories, terrible financial advice, exaggerated career achievements, relationship complaints and the same five jokes that stopped being funny three years ago.
By the end of the night, nobody knows what happened in the movie, somebody has offended somebody else, and a heroic amount of confidence has been generated from absolutely no evidence.
Essentially: a men’s support group for people who would rather die than admit they need a men’s support group.
The film itself is largely ceremonial. One bloke picks something unbearably long to prove he has taste, another falls asleep 25 minutes in, someone spends the entire night on his phone, and the loudest idiot explains the plot to everyone despite clearly not understanding it.
Conversation usually consists of recycled stories, terrible financial advice, exaggerated career achievements, relationship complaints and the same five jokes that stopped being funny three years ago.
By the end of the night, nobody knows what happened in the movie, somebody has offended somebody else, and a heroic amount of confidence has been generated from absolutely no evidence.
Essentially: a men’s support group for people who would rather die than admit they need a men’s support group.
movie club by kryptic888 September 4, 2026
