2 definitions by koriandr
1) An American tabloid style talk show which exploits people of low socioeconomic and educational status, who are seeking paternity testing or lie detector testing to prove infidelity.
2) A tv show where you would find the most ignorant and ratchet Americans who weren't ignorant and ratchett enough for Jerry Springer.
3) A show where people go when they are too dumb or lazy to hit up a lab or the family court for a paternity test.
4) A show where women dash backstage like Olympic runners when they hear that the man they accused is not the baby daddy.
5) A show where Maury asks the accused man, "If this is your child, you will step up and take care of it," but the viewer can predict with 100% accuracy that the man won't do shit whether or not he is the father.
2) A tv show where you would find the most ignorant and ratchet Americans who weren't ignorant and ratchett enough for Jerry Springer.
3) A show where people go when they are too dumb or lazy to hit up a lab or the family court for a paternity test.
4) A show where women dash backstage like Olympic runners when they hear that the man they accused is not the baby daddy.
5) A show where Maury asks the accused man, "If this is your child, you will step up and take care of it," but the viewer can predict with 100% accuracy that the man won't do shit whether or not he is the father.
Joseph: listen bitch I ain't your babby daddy
Maria: Fuck you..we gonna go on Maury and find out.
Joseph: Imma be laughing like a mother fucker when you run backstage after Maury tell you I'm not the father.
*2 months later..yes he is the father
Maria: You know this is your son now! You told Maury you would step up and be a father if this is your kid.
Joseph: Bitch you funny. All the guys say that.
Maria: Fuck you..we gonna go on Maury and find out.
Joseph: Imma be laughing like a mother fucker when you run backstage after Maury tell you I'm not the father.
*2 months later..yes he is the father
Maria: You know this is your son now! You told Maury you would step up and be a father if this is your kid.
Joseph: Bitch you funny. All the guys say that.
by koriandr October 21, 2015
The act of a mother documenting every detail of her child's life with unnecessary photos, social media updates and blog posts. Mommy blogging also includes condescending other mothers with inaccurate parenting and/or medical advice.
Dinah: Hey girl, did you vaccinate your kids yet?
Karen: No....Jenna was saying that I shouldn't vaccinate my kids since vaccinations can cause childhood obesity.
Dinah: Are you seriously listening to Jenna? She's not even a nurse! That bitch is just mommy blogging.
Karen: Yeah girl, you're right
Karen: No....Jenna was saying that I shouldn't vaccinate my kids since vaccinations can cause childhood obesity.
Dinah: Are you seriously listening to Jenna? She's not even a nurse! That bitch is just mommy blogging.
Karen: Yeah girl, you're right
by koriandr October 21, 2015