3 definitions by joejizzle

John: How long you been sobrinski?

Mark: 6 months.
by joejizzle January 29, 2008
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Orland Park is actually a very fucked up town, but the fact that it's very affluent makes people who aren't from Orland Park believe that it's a great place to live. And in many ways, it is. It has great schools, shopping centers, recreation areas for people into sports and swimming, etc. For the most part, the houses are very nice, and definitely very pricey. It was actually rated as one of the best places to live in Barron's magazine or some shit.

However, Orland Park also has a little bit of a, how should I put this; a little bit of a drug problem. It seems like everybody and their mother is addicted to alcohol, cocaine, heroin, prescription drugs (Adderall, Vicodin, Oxycontin, Xanax). And it's sad, because the youth of this town, (those aged 15-24) for the most part, have been given every opportunity to succeed. Most kids in this town who have problems with drugs and alcohol have retarded parents, and think that sending them to an expensive rehab facility is the answer to all their problems.

I don't think the police have any idea about how bad the drug problem in Orland Park is. It's not uncommon at all to be driving down the street and see guys and girls in their cars smoking weed, sniffing cocaine/heroin, drinking, etc. They do this shit like it's legal; it's fucking crazy. It really is.

Many, many kids from Orland Park kill themselves too. For whatever reason (probably because of these drug/alcohol related issues), Orland Park is a huge haven for teen/young adult suicides. And if they're not shooting themselves in the head, hanging themselves, then they're overdosing and dying that way. It's not uncommon to have a friend who has died from suicide or a drug overdose in Orland Park. You might think, "Well, those are just the fuck-ups." But that's not the case. Some of these kids were the smartest, most popular, best looking, and with the brightest futures imaginable.

Orland Park is not a really a small town, but it kind of is I guess. There's quite a few people who live in Orland Park, (nearly 60,000) but nonetheless, it seems like everybody knows each other still. The six-degrees of separation is more like two-degrees of separation in Orland Park.

Anyway, there are many people who aren't currently Orland Park residents that look at this suburb as if it's the place to live for anybody who wants to raise a nice family. Many people strive to be able to afford a house in Orland Park because for the most part, homes will cost you between 400-450K, even the shitty ones. But be warned, Orland Park is the epitome of suburban youth gone wrong. It is the epitome of over-privileged youth taking every advantage of their privileged lives and running them into the fucking ground. The drug problem is ridiculous. If you move here for your child to have a nice place to grow up, know up front that there's a good chance he or she will do hard drugs. Also, know that he or she will probably be an alcoholic. Just don't say I didn't warn you.
John: Man, I went to Orland Park last night. Holy shit, they're fucked up.

Matt: Yeah, it's fucking crazy.
by joejizzle January 18, 2008
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basically means that the media loves violence. television, radio, and film will for the most part have much higher ratings if it's about a bunch of people getting murdered rather than something nice, like somebody saving a cat from a tree. ultimately, it's a statement about america's fascination with violence.
Johnny: you watch the news today? it was awesome, 500 people got their heads chopped off!

Tommy: hey, if it bleeds it leads.
by joejizzle May 7, 2008
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