37 definitions by h.s. willsy

A form of preversion.

When a wily sheep dog catches a pervert breaking in and molesting its flock, it may decide to teach the offender a lesson by giving them a brutal doggy raping. The way they do this is by setting up a fake sheep with a mouse trap inside its fake anus. Obviously, the mouse trap catches the perv with his pants down leaving them open to a terrible raping. Which they then get. Doggy style.
"Come here sheepy. AAAAARRRGGGGHHHH!!!!"

"Woof."

"Oh no!!!! Shepherd's delight!"

See preversions and prevert.
by h.s. willsy August 23, 2011
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1) To find oneself in a public toilet that is lacking a door lock, a toilet seat or a loo roll

2) Any situation in which poo becomes a visible nuisance
1) "Aww man. there's no toilet paper up in this smelly joint. What a shitemare."

"I've got paper for you buddy, in return for a little something something that is."

"Ted? Is that you?"

"It was always me Bill, it was always me."

2) The Indian Commonwealth Games
by h.s. willsy August 19, 2011
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A Giger Wanker is someone who straps themselves to a ceiling whilst wearing a gas mask and then proceeds to masturbate to a slide show of H.R. Giger paintings. Traditionally they will mutter, "this is normal, this is normal," to themselves until they cum when they will shout, "take that sexual perversion!"
"Why is every guy I meet gay, married or a Giger Wanker?"
by h.s. willsy August 23, 2011
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A type of carnival freak known for eating live animals
"Remember that tattoo freak in the X-Files?"

"Err...oh yeah."

"What's the name of that type of carnival performer?"

"One that eats live animals?"

"Yeah, that kind."

"They're called geeks."

"Right, right. How fucking hot was Gillian Anderson in that series?"

"Yeah. Definitely yeah."
by h.s. willsy August 23, 2011
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A sexual position that requires the strength of Superman and the dexterity of Spiderman (and, if you like it kinky, Batman's mask and rubber nipples).

If you're looking at it from the side it looks like the woman is flying. Except she's not flying, she's being held up from underneath by the guys hands and from her spladge by the guys penis. So the guy, standing up with his knees bent, has to hold her up without breaking his back and she has to keep her body in line with his penis without breaking hers. How they manage to do that and still thrust is amazing and probably involves fitness.
"How did they die?"

"Triple lindy spine-snapping mishap."

"Fair play."

"That's why the coffins are L-shaped."
by h.s. willsy August 23, 2011
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Apple fanboys who know everything about the company from the first line of code on the first Macintosh's operating system to the colour of the inner walls of Steve Job's small intestine
"OMG, I cannot, CANNOT, beliiiiiieve that you still don't have an iPod yet."

"I kind of like my mp3 player dude. I can carry a spare battery around with me in case it runs out and you can't do that with an iPod right?"

"OMG, OMG! Do you know anything about lithium-ion batteries or are you just trying to be cool? Apple bashing is so cool now right? Just get a fucking iPod and an iPhone like uuuuurverybody else."

"Look, iSpod, it's not cute anymore. I'm sick of you sticking your iPhone in my face and showing me some lame app that was seemingly designed by a twelve year old retarded kid. I'm sick of you holding up your iPad in the middle of town and shouting about how cool augmented reality is whilst running about like a fairy. And I'm sick of the sound leak from your shitty, white Apple brand head phones. So. Just. FUCK! OFF!!!!"

"OMG, like whatever."

*KILLS*
by h.s. willsy August 25, 2011
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A really horrible word for semen. Especially if it's told to you by your girlfriend
"You gonna make your dick sick?"

"...what did you just say?"

"Ha ha, dick sick. It means spunk."

"Yeah...I got that..."
by h.s. willsy August 24, 2011
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