Sluiceville

place. Withered town relying on rock-hound tourism to keep afloat. The kindness of strangers pays the wages at the Food and Fuel Emporium as well as Hiram's Hostelry and the trickle-down effect stops the leakage of young adults to the sleaze of the bigger towns in the Greater Gravelbend Region.

Rock collectors and iron pyrite enthusiasts congregate at the sluiceworks where steam-driven donkey-pumps have been keeping the tailings dry since 1846 when the gold ran out.

A new high fence is being hastily constructed upstream from town.

Cheese making and quilt pressing are now the main cottage-industries along with whittlin' likenesses of Grover Cleveland, who was born just up the river.

A gravel-slide that destroyed the saltine factory is surmounted by a cairn constructed of imported pebbles brought to the site by pilgrims after a local trapper had a dream in which he was commanded to build an edifice of stones to commemorate the disaster.

Aleuts have recently built a new seasonal encampment upstream from town.

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Let's take some pebbles up to Sluiceville to build up the cairn a bit. We could get the quilt pressed too if the line isn't too long.

by gnostic1 October 18, 2011

social walker

n. Person who is willing to walk when it is needed but isn't possessed of a bizarre desire to walk industriously for fitness or weight control.
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Want to do a couple of "Ks" before breakfast?

Ahhh. No thanks. I'll just catch a couple more"Zs". I'm more of a social walker.

by gnostic1 October 12, 2011

tech support

n. elaborate or deceptive underwiring in intimate garments.

Don't be fooled. Those girls in I.T. are getting a lot of help from tech support.

It can be hard to navigate in a wireless mode when you're used to a lot of tech support.

by gnostic1 September 19, 2010

leapstand

n. radical skateboarding trick in which the boarder leaps upwards, does a back flip, and lands on the board in a handstand.

Dude! After this truck goes by I'm going to try an ollieollieoxenfree into a leapstand. You be ready to dial 911.

by gnostic1 January 16, 2011

Blindman River

place. A bustling commune south of Blackfalds in the upper cretaceous part of Alberta. Founded in 1968 by born-again pacifists Blindman River rapidly became the local centre of gravel-related industry. Reknowned for their kettle-corn maize and recently built fancy string-bag factory the devoted inhabitants are fighting to bring prosperity and a modicum of educated classiness to the region. Clothing-optional Fridays attract new recruits for the weekends but the lack of advancement opportunities and long chants usually result in a mass exodus of the new blood by Tuesday.

Twice voted Commune of the Year by New Moon Monthly the commune is hoping to have an on-site schoolhouse completed soon.

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I need a macrame bag for my lap-top. Let's stop into Blindman River.

Why not wait until Friday?

by gnostic1 August 07, 2012

milk the steel goat

n. radical skateboarding move in which one leaps onto and over a car and lands on the board, which has gone under the car. The car should preferably be stationary and not moving at highway speed.

Dude! Did you mean to do a milk the steel goat or did you accidently swerve into traffic?

by gnostic1 February 26, 2011

naughty cash

n. money used, or earmarked, for wild sprees, sex toys, trips to Vegas etc.

I just got to sell my husband's signed football collection and I'll have enough naughty cash and penicillin money to make next weekend rock.

by gnostic1 August 06, 2011