Meat Blanket

An excessively fleshy person who manages to drape themselves over their (usually unwilling) surroundings. May or may not be accompanied by unwanted fluids, such as sweat, onion dip or . . .

Ken needed to use the restroom, but the meat blanket in the aisle seat had cut off his only escape route.

by geodave June 16, 2016

Morning Tourette's

The pucker-inducing condition experienced when you wake up realizing you are incredibly late for some kind of morning appointment i.e. your job, picking up your kids, feeding the homeless, etc. Symptoms include swearing or cursing in sharp, staccato bursts fuck fuck fuck and promising God you will never drink again.

Josh woke up, realized he was an hour late for work and suffered an extreme case of Morning Tourette's that woke up the nun he'd hooked up with the night before.

by geodave December 21, 2013

Bombasticism

The art and science of being bombastic enough to get people to listen to you, even though you're just a windbag.

Russ's bombasticism made for good ratings, despite his utter lack of content.

by geodave January 19, 2013

Couchrage

The act of expressing outrage, dissent or vitriol from the comfort of your bed or chair.

Toby's couchrage at the fat man who got stuck on the Ferris Wheel was ironic, considering he hadn't left his bed in 2 or 3 weeks.

by geodave April 07, 2015

Washing your Balls

To excessively compliment someone.

Dude, I'm not just washing your balls - I really like the narrative you put on your report.

by geodave September 07, 2013

twerky jerky

Strips of meat, pounded to tender perfection by Miley Cyrus' ass.

I tried some twerky jerky, which not surprisingly was underseasoned.

by geodave August 27, 2013

Fecquency

The frequency of one's defecation

Kevin has a high fecquency - dude is always sitting on the toilet

by geodave October 29, 2011