76 definitions by brett burkhardt
"When we go to the bar and he picks up the tab he limits us to tap beer but when I pick up the tab he insists on getting $10 martinis."
"That us such tab abuse, tell his ass he can buy his own drinks."
A common tab abuse situation.
"I forgot my purse at home, will you buy me a pack of gum and maybe a pack of smokes?"
"Sure."
"Sweet! In that case, I also need another pack of smokes, two frozen pizzas, some chips, a six pack, a box of tampons, and a bottle of vodka...oh and some orange juice..."
"That us such tab abuse, tell his ass he can buy his own drinks."
A common tab abuse situation.
"I forgot my purse at home, will you buy me a pack of gum and maybe a pack of smokes?"
"Sure."
"Sweet! In that case, I also need another pack of smokes, two frozen pizzas, some chips, a six pack, a box of tampons, and a bottle of vodka...oh and some orange juice..."
by brett burkhardt May 12, 2008
A guy who isn’t thin or wiry but just plain bony but who’s great in bed or has an amazing endowment.
“What do you see in him?”
“He’s a real bony pony and I’m going to ride him until dawn.”
When Carlos’ reputation of being a bony pony got out he couldn’t get a night to himself.
“He’s a real bony pony and I’m going to ride him until dawn.”
When Carlos’ reputation of being a bony pony got out he couldn’t get a night to himself.
by brett burkhardt April 27, 2008
The insanely annoying little girl voice that immature and stupid women love to use, especially when trying to weasel shit from other people.
When Steve heard the hottie at the bar talking in a little girl lisp he knew she was going to be a pain in the ass.
“Damn it, woman, you’re 27 years old, stop talking like a fucking 5 year old! It’s just fucking sad at this point! This little girl lisp shit isn’t cute anymore, it’s just pathetic!”
“Damn it, woman, you’re 27 years old, stop talking like a fucking 5 year old! It’s just fucking sad at this point! This little girl lisp shit isn’t cute anymore, it’s just pathetic!”
by brett burkhardt April 27, 2008
A man on the DL who lurks around public restrooms, parks, truck stops, porn stores, the locker room and shower at the gym, etc. looking for some random stranger(s) to have sex with.
I hate going to the gym on Thursdays after work. There’s this creepy DL Lurker who always seems to be hanging around in the shower or wandering the locker room in a towel.
I swear to God, her boyfriend is a down low lurker. I see him hanging around by the library bathroom three nights a week.
I swear to God, her boyfriend is a down low lurker. I see him hanging around by the library bathroom three nights a week.
by brett burkhardt April 27, 2008
That guy had a real douche dispute. He called in to demand free pizza because there were only 30 pieces of pepperoni on his pizza.
“I want to have all my money back from this flight, it was delayed by 45 minutes.”
“Ma’am, we were in the middle of a blizzard, you’re lucky your flight was even able to leave. If you want to continue with this douche dispute, I will be forced to disconnect this call.”
“I want to have all my money back from this flight, it was delayed by 45 minutes.”
“Ma’am, we were in the middle of a blizzard, you’re lucky your flight was even able to leave. If you want to continue with this douche dispute, I will be forced to disconnect this call.”
by brett burkhardt April 27, 2008
Not exactly a fuck buddy but someone who you have friendly conversation with just before and after sex during regular booty calls.
“Nick is a great Booty Buddy but I just don’t think we’d get along if we spent time together not having sex.”
by brett burkhardt April 27, 2008
1. Someone who spells their name when they don’t need to, especially if they start using words. The words chosen are usually random or far more interesting than the person.
2. Someone who has a fucked up name but just won’t spell it and expects you to know how it should be spelled.
2. Someone who has a fucked up name but just won’t spell it and expects you to know how it should be spelled.
"My name is Pam Jones....That’s P-A-M....J-O-N-E-S." Said the spelling bee-otch
“My name is Joe Smith...J as in Jammin’, O as in Octopus, E as in Enlightenment....S as in Socialism, M as in Macho, I as in Illicit, T as in Tangerine, and H as in Heavenly”
“Sir, could you stop being a spelling bee-otch for one minute here.”
“My name is Jaxq Villaxiquocal.”
“Can you spell that please, Sir.”
“No, you should know how to spell that it’s a very simple name.”
“Well, if you’re going to be a spelling bee-otch I’m afraid that I just can’t help you today, sir.”
“My name is Joe Smith...J as in Jammin’, O as in Octopus, E as in Enlightenment....S as in Socialism, M as in Macho, I as in Illicit, T as in Tangerine, and H as in Heavenly”
“Sir, could you stop being a spelling bee-otch for one minute here.”
“My name is Jaxq Villaxiquocal.”
“Can you spell that please, Sir.”
“No, you should know how to spell that it’s a very simple name.”
“Well, if you’re going to be a spelling bee-otch I’m afraid that I just can’t help you today, sir.”
by brett burkhardt April 27, 2008