Pro Crastinator

A pro crastinator is someone who takes procrastination to the next level.

The pro crastinator's motto is "Why put off something until tomorrow that I can put off until the day after tomorrow?"
Jim: It's April 30th. Did you get your tax refund back yet?

Joe: It's April already?

Jim: Joe, you aren't a procrastinator, you are a pro crastinator. Pass me your bong.
by Ur Daddie March 15, 2011
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Clusterfuckturducken

A clusterfuckturducken phenomena is when a brand new clusterfuck muddle develops inside of a preexisting clusterfuck predicament. If you are observing several unbelievably deeply embedded clusterfuckturducken layers, most likely the outer layer is your federal government.
Bro, “no-fly zone” is a euphemism for war. Obama is getting in touch with his inner neocon by following France’s (of all countries) non-US national security risk-justified military incursion in a pseudo-country which is at best a loose collection of like 150 Arab tribes – mainly to protect European oil interests but in the guise of protecting armed anti-establishment Libyan rebels.

We have no congressionally certified entrance or exit strategy. UN Security Council Russian, Chinese, Indian, Brazilian and German members don’t support this. Defense Secretary Robert Gates himself warned against this. This whole thing could have been avoided by judicious CIA pressure on Gaddafi weeks ago before the killing started. Obama is now trying to wash his hands of this mission by handing, can you imagine, control of our US military over to some international political steering committee. All this during a time period when the US is already in two Middle Eastern wars, we are already in financial in dire straits, and Muslim nations worldwide are already significantly anti-US.

Has Obama even considered that he is unintended-consequence-like aligning with anti-Gaddafi Libyan al-Qaeda affiliates? After Obama specifically campaigned on his constitutional law professor opinion that US presidents do not have the power under our constitution to unilaterally authorize military attacks? The graphic of this make-it-up-as-you-go plan is a complicated embedded venn-diagram-like clusterfuckturducken.
by Ur Daddie April 08, 2011
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Ach

Barack Hussein Obama

Ach is the dictionary pronunciation of the letter "H" which refers to Obama similarly to how Dubya (or W) is used to refer to former president George Walker Bush.
Pete: Ach peddled his 3.6 Trillion dollar budget on TV last night again. That's trillion with a "T".

John: Ya I saw that. Grab your ankles and get ready to scream.

Jack: Really? I didn't know you two watched anything more complicated than American Idol. And pass me my fattie back.
by Ur Daddie May 04, 2009
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vapor politics

Viagrated political rhetoric found totally missing after a cursory double-o.
“He doesn’t have a chance.”

“What? You been ripping the bong dude? He'll win the nomination and the election because the average voting American can't detect vapor politics even when it's blowing their skirt.”
by Ur Daddie February 22, 2008
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Golden Karma Rule

Do unto others as they have done unto you.
Alice: Patti, is that your boyfriend Bob with another girl over there?

Patti: WTF? You're right. Asshole! I guess he doesn't know about the Golden Karma Rule.

Patti (texting on phone): Hey Fred, what are you doing tomorrow night?
by Ur Daddie January 15, 2021
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Cut Cap & Balance

Cut Cap & Balance is a pledge any sound thinking American can take which promotes cutting already enacted excessively crazy federal spending, permanently capping federal spending at a reasonable sustainable level, and amending the US constitution to require a balanced federal budget.

The pledge is commonly thusly repeated (hand over heart optional):

I pledge to require legislators to oppose any debt limit

increase unless all three of the following conditions have

been met:

Cut - Substantial cuts in spending that will reduce the

deficit next year and each and every thereafter.

Cap - Enforceable spending caps that will put federal

spending on a path to a balanced budget.

Balance - Congressional passage of a Balanced

Budget Amendment to the U.S. Constitution which

includes both a spending limitation and a super-

majority for raising taxes, in addition to balancing

revenues and expenses.
Tina: Yo Tom, you wild and crazy Tea Partier, you keep complaining about nutty spending liberals but I don't get what you are offering instead.

Tom: My dearest Tina, I'm not just a Tea Partier, I'm a member of The Party of FUCK NO!. Us TPoFN!’ers right now are asking every clear thinking American to take the Cut Cap & Balance pledge.

Tina: Fucking a !

Tom: Rolling over off the wet spot – I just did.
by Ur Daddie July 20, 2011
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TWFKATWOT

Acronym for The War Formerly Known As The War On Terror which was renamed to the Overseas Contingency Operation by Obama's administration.
Tom: What was it Obama changed The War On Terror to?

Jim: I can never remember. I just refer to it as TWFKATWOT.

Tom: Roger
by Ur Daddie March 31, 2009
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