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Ur Daddie's definitions

A Charlie Sheen

A Charlie Sheen is an enormous outrageously excessive kitchen-sink like cocktail of alcoholic and chemical intoxicants which will without any doubt immediately kill anybody whose heart does not pump Charlie Sheen's tiger blood, and which will surely be responsible some day for killing its namesake as well.

Often otherwise known as “a suicide” or "a 911".

Often served by hookers who plan to later steal your wallet.

Children, do not try this at home. Immediately call 911 if you even hear someone discussing let alone preparing a Charlie Sheen.
Coroner’s report: Just one more idiot who either was suicidal or who said to himself, “Ya, that makes sense to me, I got tiger blood too; I think I’ll make myself a Charlie Sheen”.
by Ur Daddie March 15, 2011
mugGet the A Charlie Sheenmug.

Texterrhea

Excessive texting. Texterrhea is to texting what the galloping Hershey’s is to crapping.
Nancy: Every since that POS Jim broke up with his GF Sally, she’s had a nasty case of texterrhea.
Sam: AYTMTB?
Nancy: FU
Sam: A3
by Ur Daddie March 12, 2009
mugGet the Texterrheamug.

Cut Cap & Balance

Cut Cap & Balance is a pledge any sound thinking American can take which promotes cutting already enacted excessively crazy federal spending, permanently capping federal spending at a reasonable sustainable level, and amending the US constitution to require a balanced federal budget.

The pledge is commonly thusly repeated (hand over heart optional):

I pledge to require legislators to oppose any debt limit

increase unless all three of the following conditions have

been met:

Cut - Substantial cuts in spending that will reduce the

deficit next year and each and every thereafter.

Cap - Enforceable spending caps that will put federal

spending on a path to a balanced budget.

Balance - Congressional passage of a Balanced

Budget Amendment to the U.S. Constitution which

includes both a spending limitation and a super-

majority for raising taxes, in addition to balancing

revenues and expenses.
Tina: Yo Tom, you wild and crazy Tea Partier, you keep complaining about nutty spending liberals but I don't get what you are offering instead.

Tom: My dearest Tina, I'm not just a Tea Partier, I'm a member of The Party of FUCK NO!. Us TPoFN!’ers right now are asking every clear thinking American to take the Cut Cap & Balance pledge.

Tina: Fucking a !

Tom: Rolling over off the wet spot – I just did.
by Ur Daddie July 20, 2011
mugGet the Cut Cap & Balancemug.

Pro Crastinator

A pro crastinator is someone who takes procrastination to the next level.

The pro crastinator's motto is "Why put off something until tomorrow that I can put off until the day after tomorrow?"
Jim: It's April 30th. Did you get your tax refund back yet?

Joe: It's April already?

Jim: Joe, you aren't a procrastinator, you are a pro crastinator. Pass me your bong.
by Ur Daddie March 15, 2011
mugGet the Pro Crastinatormug.

Gates gate

Refers to the legal case in which Henry Louis Gates Jr, a Harvard Professor who teaches, among other topics, identity politics issues such as racial profiling accuses sergeant James Crowley of the Cambridge police force, who himself teaches other Cambridge police officers about racial profiling and how to avoid it, of racial profiling when sergeant Crowley arrested Professor Gates for disorderly conduct on July 16th 2009.
Pete: What's up with that thing about that black Harvard professor accusing the white cop of racial profiling?

John: Ya I've seen it. It's Gates gate. It's all over the news. Now get your fat brown eye off the remote so I can watch Red Eye.
by Ur Daddie July 24, 2009
mugGet the Gates gatemug.

Golden Karma Rule

Do unto others as they have done unto you.
Alice: Patti, is that your boyfriend Bob with another girl over there?

Patti: WTF? You're right. Asshole! I guess he doesn't know about the Golden Karma Rule.

Patti (texting on phone): Hey Fred, what are you doing tomorrow night?
by Ur Daddie January 15, 2021
mugGet the Golden Karma Rulemug.

Ach

Barack Hussein Obama

Ach is the dictionary pronunciation of the letter "H" which refers to Obama similarly to how Dubya (or W) is used to refer to former president George Walker Bush.
Pete: Ach peddled his 3.6 Trillion dollar budget on TV last night again. That's trillion with a "T".

John: Ya I saw that. Grab your ankles and get ready to scream.

Jack: Really? I didn't know you two watched anything more complicated than American Idol. And pass me my fattie back.
by Ur Daddie May 4, 2009
mugGet the Achmug.

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