18 definitions by Tim Jerome
John: "I'm gonna git me some mud flaps for Sherrie T. I cain't decide yet on the Deputy Dawg or Taz ones."
by Tim Jerome March 16, 2008
by Tim Jerome March 19, 2008
When you get so drunk you tell a good friend about the time you were crazily in love with an adrogynous looking person who later turned out to be a female. Because of this revelation your drunken confession delves into epiphanies about your latent homosexuality then skips to your past crushes on (and platonic affairs with) older married people before finally detailing your favorite methods for having pillow sex. Instances of oversharing are often followed by headaches, embarrassment, feelings of vulnerability, extensive journaling and/or therapy and (sometimes) long walks alone to find yourself.
You: "...and that is ultimately what led me to realize that I might be gay. Not gay in the David Bowie sense but gay in the bi-curious way. I mean, aren't we all? I want to have a married best friend, but a friend of the same sex who you harbor sexual feelings for...there's just something exciting about that. I guess I've never really admitted this to myself. All the emails, and "dates" and trips with Katie Couric were obviously leading somewhere, but there's something I felt about my male friends that was just... It's like the time in college when I took LSD. I was turned on by the risk of it, like riding a rollercoaster without a safety harness. I mean, I sort of knew I would come out OK afterwards but I also..."
Your friend: (to him-or her-self) Sheesh! what an oversharer. I wish I had a tape recorder.
Your friend: (to him-or her-self) Sheesh! what an oversharer. I wish I had a tape recorder.
by Tim Jerome October 13, 2008
When you get so drunk you tell a good friend about the time you were crazily in love with an adrogynous looking person who later turned out to be a female. Your drunken confession delves into epiphanies about your latent homosexuality, your past crushes on (and platonic affairs with) older married people and your dabblings in suicidal behavior. Instances of oversharing are often followed by headaches, embarrassment, vulnerability, extensive journaling and/or therapy and (sometimes) long walks alone.
You: "...and that is ultimately what led me to realize that a homosexual romp with a married best friend could be a character building experience instead of a moral transgression. All the emails, and "dates" and trips were obviously leading up to something. It's like the time in college when I took LSD. I was turned on by the risk of it, like riding a rollercoaster without a safety harness. I mean, I sort of knew I would come out OK but I also..."
Your friend: (to him-or her-self) Sheesh! what an oversharer.
Your friend: (to him-or her-self) Sheesh! what an oversharer.
by Tim Jerome September 17, 2008
Forest Gump: "Life is like a box of chocolates...(takes bite out of piece of chocolate)...you never know what you're gonna get."
Me: "What a fucking stupid idiot, but, I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles."
Me: "What a fucking stupid idiot, but, I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles."
by Tim Jerome March 19, 2008
An extremely wealthy suburb in upstate New York much like Greenwich, CT or Beverly Hills, CA. Don't even bother moving here in you're not a millionaire. Tourists, however, are always welcome.
Donald Trump: "I flew to New Hartford yesterday for a haircut."
Wealthy New Hartford man: "Let's go to my $500,000 mansion and rub whip cream on our bodies in front of the fire."
Wealthy New Hartford women: "When I'm depressed I like to roll around in a big pile of money to lift myself up."
Bumper Sticker on a New Hartford SUV: WHOEVER DIES WITH THE MOST TOYS WINS!
Wealthy New Hartford man: "Let's go to my $500,000 mansion and rub whip cream on our bodies in front of the fire."
Wealthy New Hartford women: "When I'm depressed I like to roll around in a big pile of money to lift myself up."
Bumper Sticker on a New Hartford SUV: WHOEVER DIES WITH THE MOST TOYS WINS!
by Tim Jerome November 19, 2007
A person who displays a penchant for LL Bean and Land's End clothes, Hammy's can often be found congregating around coffee shops where acoustic folk music blasts so loud from the overhead speakers that people have to shout in order to be heard. While Hammys usually have an above average IQ, their lagging taste in current popular culture has marginalzed them from mainstream American society.
With-it Person: "Dude, how many times are you going to re-read Zen and the Art of Motorcylce Maintenance? Don't you like any of the new writers like Nick Hornby and Dave Eggers?"
Hammy: "Nick and Dave WHO?"
With-it person: "Sheesh!"
Hammy: "Come on! Let's go listen to some Pearl Jam and play hackey sack!"
Hammy: "Nick and Dave WHO?"
With-it person: "Sheesh!"
Hammy: "Come on! Let's go listen to some Pearl Jam and play hackey sack!"
by Tim Jerome November 18, 2007