Definitions by The Pirate of Pissants
Sanchezed the TP
The act of unrolling the toilet paper part way, then wiping a shit-laden finger on the tissue, then carefully re-rolling it. The future victim encounters a shitty piece of tissue, much to their horror and disgust.
Sanchezed the TP by The Pirate of Pissants December 24, 2013
Restroom jazz hands
Man, that guy made restroom jazz hands for over a minute before he figured out the air dryer didn't work.
Restroom jazz hands by The Pirate of Pissants August 27, 2013
furniture
Office workers that have been there so long, and do so little, that you only notice them when they move or are missing.
furniture by The Pirate of Pissants April 25, 2011
Facebook Proxy
When somebody looking over your shoulder tells you to post something on somebody's Facebook page, when you have no desire to leave a message for that person.
Girlfriend: "Hey! Post Happy Birthday" on your nephews Facebook page !"
Me: "I don't even know him. He is my sister's son."
Girlfriend: "Just do it !"
Me: "Yes, m'am-you are a Facebook Proxy."
Me: "I don't even know him. He is my sister's son."
Girlfriend: "Just do it !"
Me: "Yes, m'am-you are a Facebook Proxy."
Facebook Proxy by The Pirate of Pissants October 29, 2010
ghetto sparkler
Using a lit wooden punk stick (usually free at a fireworks stand) as a sparkler. When you wave it around in the dark you get a pyrotechnic effect.
ghetto sparkler by The Pirate of Pissants July 4, 2009
sleep tax
The price you pay for oversleeping. You sleep so late that you have to buy breakfast on the way to work/school. Sometimes it's a cost/benefit equation: Is sleeping late worth the price of breakfast at a drive-through restaurant?
Q: Yo man! Why you so broke?
A: Ahh man, these late nights at the club are killing me! I've had to pay sleep tax three times this week. I'm sure getting tired of Mickey Dee's sausage muffins and hashbrowns.
A: Ahh man, these late nights at the club are killing me! I've had to pay sleep tax three times this week. I'm sure getting tired of Mickey Dee's sausage muffins and hashbrowns.
sleep tax by The Pirate of Pissants May 20, 2007
Nomadic Colon
Nomadic colons are people who travel to restrooms outside of their work area (past the closest restroom) to utilize a restroom commonly used by another work group or on another floor.
The nomadic colon travels there for unknown reasons, perhaps from a fear of embarrassment from co-workers, a desire to defile new and unexplored territory, or for comfort reasons.
The nomadic colon is predominately male in gender, but female nomads have been observed.
The nomadic colon travels there for unknown reasons, perhaps from a fear of embarrassment from co-workers, a desire to defile new and unexplored territory, or for comfort reasons.
The nomadic colon is predominately male in gender, but female nomads have been observed.
Oh, man! Some nomadic colon stunk the rest room on our floor!
I spotted the elusive nomadic colon when he emerged from our restroom and immediately entered the stairway to return to his home territory.
I spotted the elusive nomadic colon when he emerged from our restroom and immediately entered the stairway to return to his home territory.
Nomadic Colon by The Pirate of Pissants April 12, 2006