Definitions by Terio Marin
Misses Pippi
MARCO: "Hey Misses Pippi, thanks for the hot yellow urine I just sat on and the stale lingering Cheerio smell." MISSES PIPPI: " It's got electrolytes."
Misses Pippi by Terio Marin June 13, 2016
dike water
In human terms, a dike is a long narrow hole dug into to divert water. In lesbionic terms, when a lesbian, especially a Bulldyke, has another person (drink the water), or in laywoman's terms, charms another to let her dig into that hole... and flick that bean in the process of course.
In the hot sun, two prisoners in orange jumpsuits dig a trench. BEANIE: "Gosh it's so hot. I'm sweaty and wet all over." BULLDYKE: "Wet is good. Even better when we get into that long narrow hole ." BEANIE: "It sounds like you just served up a hot glass of dike water." BULLDYKE: "Busted... again." Bulldyke laughs, snorts, burps, then farts.
dike water by Terio Marin June 10, 2016
first come second swallow
A hybrid, progressive form of "first come first serve" where the second person literally gets the short end of the stick and has to swallow.
OVERCONFIDENT GUY: "Alright ladies, I'll be in the break room waiting. Remember it's first come second swallow." Overconfident guy pretends to fire his make believe guns at the two girls then walks away with a dumb grin on his face. Girl #1 turns to her friend. GIRL #1: "More like, last one in tastes the rotten eggs." The girls laugh and high five... missing each other's hand of course.
first come second swallow by Terio Marin May 28, 2016
organic panic
When a douchy, moccasin wearing, cool bearded hipster dude and his equally douchy girlfriend named Kale, who breastfeeds a baby that's not hers, can't find an organic product at the supermarket and they go apeshit.
Trader Joe's at night, probably on Earth Day. DOUCHY FEMALE BREASTFEEDING BABY THAT'S NOT HERS: (flabbergasted) "What the fuck? Where's the organic quinoa? There's no organic quinoa! HIPSTER DUDE: (Screaming effeminately at a Trader Joe's crewman ) "Where's the organic quinoa? This is the 21st century, they don't have these problems in Canada man." LOUDSPEAKER : "Organic panic aisle 3, I repeat, Organic panic aisle 3. Prepare for inevitable hissy fit, words of entitlement , and of course, vote for Bernie discourse.
organic panic by Terio Marin May 23, 2016
platonic anal
When regular sex is out of the question with your work wife, classmate, or friend. A "platonic anal" hint or suggestion never hurts... well it doesn't hurt the person giving the anal.
MARCO: "Hey Erin, I wouldn't want to ruin our work relationship with classic vaginal sex or an unwanted pregnancy. Howabout we go all Christian Republican in this bitch and do a little platonic anal." ERIN: "Makes sense. Let's do this! Although I must warn you, I had Chipotle for lunch."
platonic anal by Terio Marin May 22, 2016
Alabama ear waffle
When he thinks it's a good idea to ejaculate on your head, and it's not. Days later, after not Q-tipping properly, white waffle shaped debris falls from the ear commonly during Sunday brunch.
At Sunday brunch, Erin's Dad sees something fall from Erin's ear. He picks it up with his finger. ERIN'S DAD: (to Erin) "Look pumpkin, looks like a dead piece of skin. Someone needs to moisturize." ERIN'S MOM: "Oh, she moisturizes alright." Erin looks to her mother stunned. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to ERIN'S Dad, the "dead piece of skin" falls into his bottomless Mojito. He takes a drink. Erin's mom laughs, "Hey, lemme know how that Alabama ear waffle tastes." Erin and Erin's Mom high five and crack up laughing.
Alabama ear waffle by Terio Marin May 19, 2016
alabama state of mind
Waiting in line at Walmart, hiked up on on ephedrine, purchasing more ephedrine for your girlfriend's weight loss ambitions and eyeballing a fine little Philly walking past your eyeballs hoping your girlfriend's body is as fine as hers... turns out it's your sister.
The Walmart cashier notices a sweaty, angst-ridden man ogling a woman. Cashier: "That'll be $16.37 for your ... (Cashier puts up her hands and makes air quotes) ... sinus medicine." The angst-ridden man continues to visually have sex with the woman. The woman turns around and sees the angst-ridden man. Woman: "Hi Marco, where's mom is she waiting on the car? Cashier: " Whoo-wee, that's some shit! Marco you checked out that ass like it's passing out five dollar EBT cards, you in a Alabama State of Mind!
alabama state of mind by Terio Marin May 16, 2016