Stoatman's definitions

mingeeta

A lady from the Indian subcontinent who prefers the "company" of other ladies

Contraction of minge and "eater"

Cor, look at mingeeta ova vere, she's havin' a go at your sistah!

by Stoatman August 6, 2004

boerish behaviour

1: Acting like a boer
2: Favorite catch phrase of my South African headmaster, whose pet crusade was (ironically) to stamp it out in his school.

(English colonel, pith helmet, socks up to the knees, comb tucked into one sock, to scruffy colonial children): I say, look here you! Less of the boerish behaviour, if you please, or it'll be six of the best, trousers down, and no pudding for you tonight!

by Stoatman August 6, 2004

boer

Etymology: Dutch for "farmer", or more importantly (and accurately), "peasant".
1: Dutch-speaking settlers of South Africa, who got p0wned by the British Army.
2: One who engages in boerish behaviour or other peasantry, such as drinking White Lightning and giving glasgow kisses to one's mates, passers-by, and other innocents.

NL: Kék uit, hé, je fucking boer!

by Stoatman August 6, 2004

cloggy

A particular breed of human who inhabit an exceedingly flat country bordering on the North Sea. Commonly over 6' tall, sporting a bushy moustache which does nothing to hide their enomous overbite, often seen riding ancient bicycles without due care and attention, and famed for wearing wooden shoes (clogs), from which their name derives. More likely to be on state-sponsored indefinite sick leave than have a job, these animals stack themselves into state-sponsored apartment blocks in the most densely populated area of northern Europe. Often seen in other parts of the world in their caravans, liberally stocked with chocolate sprinkles (to be eaten on bread), Heineken, meat croquettes, and porno mags, shocked that they are above sea level and not quite sure how to deal with the rarified air of the Cambridgeshire mountains. Children and dogs are usually untrained.

"I was on the train yesterday, and some hippy-arsed cloggie wasn't watching her untrainable kids, and one of them got out at a station for a joke and the train pulled away, so she pulled the emergency cord & delayed the train for 1/2 an hour. She couldn't see what the problem was.

by Stoatman August 6, 2004

lekker

Dutch and Afrikaans (South African) for "tasty", but used incessantly by the cloggies to describe everything that could ever possibly be considered even marginally above mediocre. Despite this not leaving much wriggle room in Holland, they manage to use it all the same, since they don't know any better. Rumour has it that after visiting Belgium (or indeed any other country less flat than Holland), use of this term diminishes remarkably, except when talking /about/ Belgium. I wonder why.

Lekker eten (tasty food) - it's not
Lekker meidjes (pretty girls) - they're not unless you like 6' rugby-playing types
Lekker slaap (ZA) (sleep well) - you won't
Lekker weer (nice weather) - it's not

by Stoatman August 6, 2004

sa80

Colloquial name for the current British service rifle. So good that no other country has bought it (Jamaica and some African country had a few foisted on them as part of an aid package). Although extremely accurate, the balance is all wrong, the older versions were horrifically unreliable, and it is physically impossible to fire it from the left shoulder. It is also one of the heaviest service weapons in current use, at around 2kg heavier than an M16. It is probably also the most expensive service rifle ever, since the unit cost after the recent modification is now over 1000 pounds.

"Daddy, can you get me a meccano set for christmas, I want to build myself an SA80"

by Stoatman August 21, 2004

desert eagle

A rediculously large and totally impractical pistol, often found gold plated in the hands of pimps with small genetalia. Designed in Israel, probably to prove that what they lack in foreskin they make up for in firepower...

Fo'shnizzle, bihatch - don't you go getting your jizzed-up fingahz all over mah bling-bling Desert Eagle know wot Ah mean? Uh huh? Now pass me mah crack, bihatch!

by Stoatman August 21, 2004