smackmonkey

Similar to the willy wrench, the main difference being that the woman thinks that smacking the penis during masturbation gives men a greater thrill. Wise up ladies...it does NOTHING for stimulation.
"It was going fine until she smackmonkeyed my cock like it had tried to bite her"
by Rory McMoose May 01, 2005
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american inch

Half the size of the British Inch.
MAN"Hey baby. Want to see my 8 inch monster?"
WOMAN"Are you SURE that's 8 inches?! Looks more like 4 to me..."
MAN"Are you calling me a liar?! Impossible! Us Americans are world renowned for our honesty!"
by Rory McMoose May 05, 2005
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bumbeard

1.)The hair on a man which stretches from in between his arse cheeks to the back of his testicles.
2.)A beard grown by a 14 year old which looks awful!
3.)An insult
1.)"Dude it's so hot today. Give me a second to squeeze the sweat from my bumbeard"
2.)"No, i'm NOT going to serve you beer. Just because you have that bumbeard doesnt change the fact that you look 12"
3.)"Screw you, you fucking bumbeard"
by Rory McMoose May 01, 2005
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ladyspray

"Dude, that bitch almost drowned me with her ladyspray."
by Rory McMoose April 27, 2005
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Fartlek

Forced usage of alternating speeds and positions due to movements of ecstacy in cunnilingus, making it difficult to achieve maximum clitoral stimulation. In extreme cases, can result in having to start again, causing irritation to both sexes.
"She started moving her hips up, so I had to fartlek her. She hit me as she was 'so close', bringing shame upon my family name."
by Rory McMoose April 27, 2005
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doggy

A sexual position, usually the best for a quickie, where the man has sex with a woman from behind.
Bend her over and fuck her doggy style.
by Rory McMoose April 29, 2005
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platypus eater

1.)A man who enjoys giving oral more than receiving.
2.)A man who eats platypi in his spare time.
1.)"Don't go near him hun, that man's a serious platypus eater. I don't want to think of all the places that tongue has been"
2.)"Quick! Hide your platypi! Mike the platypus eater is about!"
by Rory McMoose May 03, 2005
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