Through the Joking Glass

When you start telling a joke or a story, realise halfway through that the listeners are not going to find it funny, but have already committed to telling it and feel obligated to finish.
Guy 1: A man goes into a ...(tharr be more)bar and asks for a Bulgarian Carpet Bomb...
Girl: Ewww that's gross!
Guy 1: Erm, yeah, anyway, and so, erm, the bartender...
Guy 2: Man, you are so Through the Joking Glass.
Guy 1: Shut up you Mantraitor
by Reverend Pope March 13, 2010
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Haggis Surprise

Where some guys exhume a recently dead person's stomache and then fuck it
After ejaculating they shit into it, mix in entrails and ideally some period blood and then cooks it and serve it to somoene with some delicious chocolate (shit) sauce
Guy 1: 'I Invited some guys over to watch die hard on saturday night, instead we ended up giving my neighbour our haggis surprise'

Guy 2: 'Sweet man I cant belive I missed it'
by Reverend Pope May 20, 2009
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Chocolate Cheese Toasty

A guy shits into a girls vagina, then quickly slips his cock in and fucks her until he jisms into her cunt, then he gets down and tucks into the delicious chocolate-cheese toasty he has created
Bailey: Gee Veronica not only do I really need a shit, am desperately horny, but I'm hungry as hell as well

Veronica: Dont worry Bailey, how about we cook up a sumptuous chocolate cheese toasty

Bailey: Oh wow, what an idea, they're my favourite
by Reverend Pope May 21, 2009
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Catalonian Roulette

A Person, usually female, takes several slow to medium acting laxatives. Several males, usually four, then punch the bottom out of a chair and sit her down on it, placing themselves around the chair they take it in turns to place their heads under it for a set amount of time, usually around 10 to 20 seconds. Eventually the female will shit upon the head of one male meaning he is the looser. The other males will proceed to kick him in the groin area as he is being defecated upon
Liz "Happy Birthday Johnny, as a special treat I brought some laxatives with me, now we can play Catalonian Roulette"

Johnny "No freaking way, that is totally awesome, this is gonna be the best Birthday ever"

Matt "Sound frickin sweet, I hope I dont loose again, last time you guys kicked me in the crotch so hard I was pissing blood for a week"
by Reverend Pope September 11, 2009
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Maltese Mud Cannon

A sexual practice involving usually two males, one male shoves a battery in and our of his japs eye a few times then begins to masterbate, the second takes a shit into the first guys engorged uretha. the first man continues to masterbate and jizzes out shitty man semen into the mouth of the first
Edward: Yo ek you horny?

Ek: I kinda really need a shit

Edward: Im so horny, hows about a Maltese Mud Cannon

Ek: Oh my god, that is almost the best idea ever, im desperate to slurp up the slippery shit
by Reverend Pope May 27, 2010
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Stunt Shitting

The act of defecating as a performance or art. A highly valued skill, it is necessary to be able to shit on demand, producing interesting shapes, large quantities or to fire huge distances

Famous examples include Walther Beaverwich the trapeez artist who could perform amazing somersaults while firing shit all over the audience

For further examples see Albanian Roulette Albanian Sausage Factory} Hamburg Oil Spill ALbanian baby Shower Haggis Surprise Bulgarian Carpet Bomb and Glaswegian Zeppelin Crash
Guy 1: Dude this gathering is so lame, bail?

Guy 2: Dont fret chum, I am an ace in the art of stunt shitting, and right now i'm cooking up a huge liquid steamer to fire

Guy 1: Man alive this is gonna be awesome, maybe ill even get caught in the spary!!
by Reverend Pope May 21, 2009
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Bulgarian Carpet Bomb

When a guy from a great height takes a watery shit all over a load of people partying
Yo Dude did you get invited to Gibbs party?

No man, but i'm gonna take a load of laxative, sneak into the rafters then give them all a Bulgarian Carpet Bomb

Woah Dude Rightgeous
by Reverend Pope May 20, 2009
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