RandyRhoads84's definitions

Jerking From Home

The art of telling your employer that you will be working from home, when your sole intention is to stream youporn all day.

Stace: Michael, when were you last in the office?
Michael: It's been months now, I've been (JFH) jerking from home

Stace: Okay, some were worried that you had a massive stroke or something

Michael: You're not too far off the mark...

by RandyRhoads84 June 17, 2020

Modern shart

Accidental shit that was wrongly anticipated to be a fart, which when left to dry forms a sometimes interesting crusted pattern on underwear.

Sold for a lucrative profit to any number of tosser art dealers who interpret the soiled garment(s) as the work of divine genius.

Those scotch bonnets last night led to accidental sharting earlier. I nearly threw away my Calvin Kleins! Luckily I had the sense to dry them on the radiator and sell the result for six figures on ebay to this insane art dealer. who thought the image looked like the last supper. I call in modern shart!

by RandyRhoads84 December 22, 2020

Wookey hole

Another name for vagina, also a series of caves in South West England.

Nick: why did you break up with Mal?
Stella: because he stuck his cock in Haz's wookey hole
Nick: I see. I guess that's why she's called Haz - because everyone has.

by RandyRhoads84 December 22, 2020

Nonce sense

A person with an uncanny ability to spot a nonce (paedophile) on first site.

I always thought Jimmy Savile was a paedo. My nonce sense was off the chart.

by RandyRhoads84 September 14, 2021

Someone else's bonzai tree

Especially relevant in big companies. When you develop an intricate, sought after skill set, but never rise to the level that was possible from your early potential, that may have been/still could be achievable elsewhere.

Zach has a PhD from an ivy league college, and has built enviable experience, but has never risen above director level in the blue chip company he works for. He's become little more than someone else's bonzai tree, and should probably leave, in order to become a red wood.

by RandyRhoads84 October 23, 2023

Band of muthas

A group of cunts, usually a toxic employer.

They may be the number one CRO, but they are a band of muthas!

by RandyRhoads84 January 10, 2021

Masacerena

The dance done by Palestinians after they kick and spit on the bodies of tortured, raped and murdered Israeli civilians, after denying that the October 7th massacre ever took place. See also gazalighting

Despite the horror that Hamas has brought upon them by way of Israeli retaliation, those Palestinians are still doing the masacerena by that Toyota pickup truck containing Shani Louk's mutilated body.

by RandyRhoads84 December 17, 2023