3 definitions by Persephone's Vacuum
The name for a person of the opposite sex that act as if they're more attractive than the average attractive person, but are in actualality far below sub par. Normally playing hard to get, the average Color Guarder is seen as an obstruction from what you are exactly trying to see, such as a clock, the blackboard, or an elephant. Does not pertain to someone at least semi-attractive. Originates from the term Color Guard meaning the portion of a school band the waves the school flag and colors. These people are over pompous because of their position and place among the social ranks, and have much bigger heads than they should (in a non-literal sense, though they're actual heads may be enlarged due to their imparing hideousness).
*Alex quickly glimpses at a movement in the corner of his eye, just to find the site of a fat chick coincidentally having the same experience as he.*
"Oooh, boy, why you lookin', you can't have this! I'm lookin' gooooood! Playa please, ya'll will never get something THIS good lookin'!"
Alex: "I-... I'm sorry, excuse me, I wasn't looking at - "
Color Guard: "Boy, I know you want this but mm, mm, mm, you ain't havin' this! Uh-uh-uh!"
"Oooh, boy, why you lookin', you can't have this! I'm lookin' gooooood! Playa please, ya'll will never get something THIS good lookin'!"
Alex: "I-... I'm sorry, excuse me, I wasn't looking at - "
Color Guard: "Boy, I know you want this but mm, mm, mm, you ain't havin' this! Uh-uh-uh!"
by Persephone's Vacuum January 22, 2005
Lucky for the man in the stall without toiletries, he released a Mexican Pipe Cleaner and went on his merry way.
by Persephone's Vacuum January 22, 2005
Originated from the name "Ms. Lister", an obscenly obese teacher of both the Latin and German languages in the state of Connecticut, Listorus may be used to describe an unnaturally old, monsterish, fat teacher or higher authority.
Ms. Fatssapotomus: "Alex, will you be a dear and run these papers down to the office? I can't support my own weight, so I'd have to sit down on a wheel chair if I wanted to move my curdeling, milky cheeks."
Alex: "Sure." *walks away*
Alex: *halfway out the door* "Fuckin' Listorus"
Alex: "Sure." *walks away*
Alex: *halfway out the door* "Fuckin' Listorus"
by Persephone's Vacuum January 22, 2005