2 definitions by NotASenatorNamedDave

shrimp

(verb)
- to be forcibly shoved in between a bed and a wall against your will

-“Ow I just got totally shrimped by my girlfriend Hannah, I’m stuck!!”

by NotASenatorNamedDave November 14, 2021

February 19

It is well known that all children birthed on this day are destined to be raging homosexuals unless able to dunk on a 10ft goal by the 6th grade. No exceptions it’s just the facts.

Doctor - “My deepest apologies ma’am your son is due February 19 and your genes aren’t likely to give him any ups”

Mom - “Oh fuck oh shit... my little boy’s gonna be a fruit and there’s nothing I can do... I guess it’s time to bring out the vacuum...”

by NotASenatorNamedDave February 14, 2020