Monkey's Dad's definitions

temporary sanity

The notion of temporary sanity argues that a defendant was sane during the commission of a crime, but later reverted to their insanity after the criminal act was carried out. This legal defense is often used to defend individuals who have committed highly reasonable, completely normal crimes of passion which any sane person could have committed and probably would have done, given opportunity, means and motive.

My client is too crazy to have ever committed the crime with which he has been charged. He can't tell a gun from a Pez dispenser. But for one fleeting moment he wasn't himself, okay? He fell under the grip of temporary sanity and took out the most corrupt politician this country has ever know. Look at him now, wearing his MAGA hat in court. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, he is very clearly insane.

by Monkey's Dad March 7, 2020

boregasmic

A woman's summation of her split-second lovemaking with a man possessing no clue as to her anatomy, her appetites, her capacity for pleasure or how to provide it.

She had barely gotten started and he was done, she thought, staring at the ceiling. Another boregasmic sprint to see how fast he could roll over and fall asleep.

by Monkey's Dad March 9, 2020

For want of a nail

A parable of exponentially cascading consequences.

For want of a nail a horseshoe was lost,
For want of a horseshoe a horse went lame,
For want of a horse a rider never got through,
For want of a rider a message never arrived,
For want of a message an army was never sent,
For want of an army a battle was lost,
For want of a battle a war was lost,
For want of a war a kingdom fell,
And all for want of a nail.

by Monkey's Dad April 2, 2020

Texazuela

Oil prices fall below zero, Texas, the nation's leading crude oil producer, looks in the mirror and sees Venezuela.

Once unimaginable, today US oil prices plunged to minus $40 a barrel, and Texazuela may face economic collapse.

by Monkey's Dad April 20, 2020

woemanizer

A man who tries to overcome his sorrow and grief with an unending string of women.

Everyone judged him for the number of women who came into and out of his life. It felt to be the only way he could banish his unremitting woe, from losses and pain he could never share. He was a woemanizer, and he alone understood why.

by Monkey's Dad October 3, 2021

Permababy

A creature, human or otherwise, who retains the characteristics of an infant, no matter how long they have lived.

Yes, we know she looks like a puppy, but she's thirteen - a Permababy.

by Monkey's Dad December 23, 2019

masturetribution

To lie beside a sleeping partner who has refused sex, and silently bring oneself to climax.

In a defiant act of masturetribution she gave herself a dozen orgasms, listening to him sleep, feeling it served him right for giving her the cold shoulder all week.

by Monkey's Dad March 12, 2020