Physical Schizophrenia

Being so fat that you have to identify as 2 people

I was denied access to the fun fair ride due to my physical schizophrenia

by Maybe on Wednesday April 09, 2023

Unicorn

While your lady is casually dropping a loaf, walk in and place the tip of your member up against her forehead whilst shouting “unicorn”. She will love this…results may vary

Bill: did you hear about Geoff? He gave his wife a unicorn…his wake is on Tuesday”

by Maybe on Wednesday February 22, 2025

Poseidon’s Tongue

When you drop a sizable dump into the toilet creating a splash back with sufficient height to be able to reach the anus. The Poseidon’s Tongue is the one drop of splashback that licks inside the anus

Dave: wow, I dropped a hefer of a dump and ended up with a Poseidon’s Tongue
Keith: that’s horrendous, you poor bastard

by Maybe on Wednesday April 13, 2022

The Typewriter

When your partners member has too much length / girth to be taken in orally by the usual methods. The typewriter is the alternative approach of approaching the schlong from the side and going to town “corn on the cob style”

Oh Susan…it was just so big I had no choice but to pull out the typewriter

by Maybe on Wednesday February 21, 2025

grilled banana

When, during a sunbed tanning session, one forgets to cover ones member with either suntan cream or a towel. The result being a sunburned, unusable Polony Pony.

Did you hear about Ted? He can't bang that hooker he ordered online because of his grilled banana.

by Maybe on Wednesday July 30, 2017